Non Sequitur by Wiley Miller for July 23, 2022

Emotionally damaged for eternity

At least it wasn’t a banjo…

When I was a little kid I wanted to learn how to play the accordion. Thought it was the coolest thing ever. Sadly, no one ever indulged me. :( And yes I like bag pipes too. Hey, I’ve never claimed to be normal. Whatever that is.

https://youtu.be/Isxaq6yuKxE

His or her mother was afraid that he would be too popular, so she made him take accordion lessons.

I wanted to be a classical composer, but all the good instruments already had somebody famous for composing on them: Bach had the organ, Liszt and Chopin the piano, Vivaldi and Paganini the violin, Telemann and Purcell the trumpet, Sousa the brass band, and so on. So I decided to specialize in quartets for bagpipe, kazoo, accordion, and banjo. Now all I need is a publisher.

So are you saying that’s accordion to policy?

Is there a minimum requirement for how long you had to take said lessons?

Hey, that’s exactly what my mother made me do!!! So I can bypass the line, good to know!!!

They’re gonna grade me on a minor scale.

I dunno, did anybody’s mother ever make them study the banjo?

“Pass on through. You suffered enough”.

So did the rest of us. We had to LISTEN. ;-)

“And … you don’t have to worry – your mother isn’t here.”

I feel sorry for those who have to work in certain retail locations, where “music” is constantly played over the PA. I’m referring to the stores which have the library of 12 songs or less being blasted continuously, for music which was never that great to begin with. Imagine hearing songs that you hate 50-100 times per week and every week.

More proof positive that “Weird Al” Yankovic is guaranteed a place in heaven.

Believe it or not, I wanted to take accordion lessons, and did for a short while. My dad played – he was amazing at playing by ear! But as with most 7-y/o kids, I wasn’t interested in practicing. Still, I kept my accordion for almost 60 years till I sold it to one of my sister’s friends recently. The day I sold it, I still played as well as any 7-y/o could! Good times!

Best sound in the WORLD… an Accordion being tossed into a Dumpster where it lands on a Banjo and a set of Bagpipes.

My late wife’s mother actually made her take accordion lessons as a child. It must have been the “Lawrence Welk Syndrome”.

On The Grand Staff of Life. Take notes.

I don’t understand all the banjo hate

Welcome to Heaven, here’s your harp…

Welcome to H*ll, here’s your accordion…

[Huh, GC doesn’t like that 2nd place name there…]

There is a new game the comments computer is playing with us/me

The banned words list ……. ‘’guess what words we don’t like? com’n give it a try’’

they must have fired the humans and now AI is watching us.

Accordion is tough. I play piano and keyboard, so I know WHAT I’m trying to do. But coordinating that pumping action is a whole different thing.

Accordion, bagpipes, banjo – I like them all. And calliope too. A merry go round just isn’t the same without calliope music.

Mammas got a squeeze box, Daddy never sleeps at night (Pete Townshend).

Little known fact: Accordion music is what they play on the elevators to heck!

I had to take violin lessons. I never got very good at it. I wanted piano lessons but my sister played the violin so I had to. :-p

Spelling, Wiley! Spelling!

When I was 11, I asked my folks for a guitar. My mom got me an accordion instead because she assumed I was talking about an electric guitar. It was a very nice accordion — a ‘youth’ model (3/4 the size of a regular one) and it did have a nice tone. At least it got me out of geography class on Fridays (for lessons). I had to take lessons for the rest of the school year, then was allowed to stop. For my birthday, my sister got me an acoustic guitar (it cost $15) and we taught ourselves to play — I taught us to play and she figured out the words to songs we heard on the radio — Kingston Trio, Bob Dylan, Chad Mitchell Trio, PPM, Joan Baez, Simon and Garfunkel, Buffy St Marie. She couldn’t play a guitar — hands were too small to reach all six strings — so she played a tenor guitar. We played some venues in high school and in college and when we got together as adults we still got out our guitars. The accordion was kept nicely in its case until I sold it to a friend 25 years later, who wanted it for her daughter. I don’t know if the daughter was happy or not.

But if you get into heaven because of the banjo there would be strings attached.

I like well played accordion. Likewise banjo, bagpipes, and shawm.

And so did the rest of the family.

https://youtu.be/tYyg21lRAs8

I always wondered what happened to Lawrence Welk…. Anna one… Anna two… Anna three… Now itsa time-a for the Lovely Lennon Sisters, take it away Myron-a Floren…

Play an accordian, go to Lark Camp. That’s the law.

I wonder how Yoko Ono will fare???

My richest former classmate got his start playing the accordian in a rock band.

Sure, just skip on past the whole “became a concert accordionist and was very successful until it was discovered he had five wives” thing. :)

A. .One A. . .and A Two A. . . . Turn on the bubble machine. . . . Ya gotta be of a certain age to make sense of that.

MY grandparents had an upright piano in their dining room, and we kids were allowed to “play” it. When I began trying to play actual songs, mom arranged for piano lessons with my grade school music teacher. That, together with learning trumpet in junior high band, was a springboard to teaching myself how to play guitar, ukulele, banjo, fiddle, dulcimer, harmonica, and flute. Was not all that good at playing, but discovered I had grandpa’s ability to pick up almost any instrument and get a recognizable tune out of it. For some reason I never did try his accordion.

An accordionist on his way to a gig, stops to get a coffee to go. Walking back to his car, he sees that the back window has been smashed. He thinks, “Oh, no,” and sure enough, there are two more accordions in the back seat.

I would send this to my brother but he wanted to take accordion lessons.

He doesn’t look like Weird Al.

My first musical instrument was the piano. However, we did not have a piano and I had to practice on a cardboard keyboard. Needless to say, those lessons didn’t take!

What, no hurdy-gurdy?

Shite, so did mine.

Weird Al referred to the accordian as “a chick repellent”

While in a catholic grade school many a student in my class where accordion players, I am assuming from this toon they get a free pass through the pearly gates. What about the ones who were there, ones who were forced to listen to the music if you can call it that?

I was never a fan of bagpipe music till I spent time in Scotland and Galicia, the Spanish province located just north of Portugal. The Galician bagpipe is called a “gaita” and has a lovely sound, as does the Scottish bagpipe.

ROFL

Some of us have been throwing off on accordions, but here’s something to consider…without accordions, there very likely wouldn’t be any polka.

He’s not the only one who suffered.

As a Myron Floren fan,I object!!