Pearls Before Swine by Stephan Pastis for June 30, 2022

I was in a bar in Manhattan in 2008 shortly after Bear-Stearns collapsed and real estate bubble burst. This is what I heard from 2 stockbroker types as I walked with the drinks from the bar to my table:

“So, how’s that house in Scarsdale?”

“Barely being paid for.”

“And you bought it when the market was at its peak.

“Muskrat Love” is now playing in my head.

Truly successful people encourage others to be successful.

the cash is always greener in someone else’s wallet!

now now, jealousy does not become you.

Nothing cultivates enmity like altruism

I remember once hearing a stand-up comic (wish I could remember his name) who would start his routine with “You know, when people say ‘just kidding,’ they’re not,” then would go on to tell the audience something like “You folks are the worst! … Just kidding …”

Most of the people that enjoy other people’s success are either their agent or bet on them at Vegas.

With the huge house comes huge taxes, huge utility bills, and huge maintenance costs, more power to you, I’ll keep the status quo!

Even a muskrat would be better than this particular Rat!

It’s so nice to see Rat express some pleasant wishes to someone else.

buy really huge house at a really huge price.

enjoy your really huge property tax bill.

it comes every year. . . . forever . . . . and it keeps getting bigger.

Success is what makes things happen ! Tis the end game of trying ;-)

Success is fine. What’s aggravating is bragging, having no gratitude, pretending you did it all by yourself, and complaining when you live the most pampered life of anyone you know.

At least Rat has the restraint to only think the bad thing this time.

Southern version: Well, bless your heart!

Bless your little heart

Most huge houses have huge mortgages attached. It is going to be very tough sledding soon as interest rates climb. Good luck if that is you, I don’t envy you, been there, done that in the early ’80s.

Want what you have and you’ll be fine. Stop worrying about what others have, and stop trying to impress others with what you have. It’s just stuff.

It’s hard to enjoy peoples success when you’re still behind them.

Out house is too big, but the location is good, it’s got a large yard for my wife’s fruit, nut and berry orchard, and the master bedroom is on the first floor. We do not miss Portland traffic either.

If you earned it, good for you!

The Canadian hacker with 27 million in bitcoin and $800,000 in cash from ransomware attacks – 30 years in prison would make me happier than 10 years.

Can you buy a house with bitcoin through a real estate agency?

bless your heart

You know, whenever a player leaves either of my favorite sports teams, I wish him the best. The team he goes to… that depends.

Actually, I like when people that I know do well AND am very happy for their success , luck or whatever, God Bless them…..

I think you hear me knocking Stefan, and I got a whole sack of muskrats with me…

Muskrats are not carniverous.They haven’t been around since DEPUTY DAWG.

HUGE mansion in Newport,Rhode Island called “The Breakers”.

One of the Vanderbilts built it to beat out everybody else.

He got to enjoy it for 5 years—-then he died in his early 50’s.Most doctors said it was overwork.

I used to follow The Rule of Thumper, “If you can’t say something nice, don’t say nothing at all.” Until I became AT&T middle-management.

What’s the opposite of schadenfreude?

I recently learned that “May I help you?” really means “Go away.” (Stolen)

Is that Norm from Cheers?

Paul Freeman (villain René Belloq in Raiders of the Lost Ark) played a character in the Scottish sitcom Monarch of the Glen who enjoyed seeing other people enjoy themselves more than anyone else I’ve ever seen in either real life or fiction.

Muskrat Suzie or Muskrat Sam?

Goat lies

Rabid muskrats…

Maybe work harder yourself. Or reevaluate your priorities.

Rat-as-cartoonist expresses Cartoon-Boy’s secret thoughts, ‘cause he’s Cartoon-Boy’s alter ego, his Other Self. And so, we forgive Rat his ink-stains….

Reminds me of that spoofy Robin Hood where the Sheriff threatens to cut his heart out — with a spoon! I mean, muskrats? What?