Pearls Before Swine by Stephan Pastis for December 08, 2021

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    BE THIS GUY  over 2 years ago

    Utility companies have regulatory commissions; the powers of the universe don’t.

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    Renatus Profuturus Frigeridus Premium Member over 2 years ago

    He/She can.

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    sirbadger  over 2 years ago

    If you like, the power company rule can be changed.

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    Templo S.U.D.  over 2 years ago

    How much postage is it going to cost that letter?

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    Wilde Bill  over 2 years ago

    Because ethics are for mortals.

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    B UTTONS  over 2 years ago

    Because the “Powers That Be In The Universe” rely on unnatural misinformation while the power company uses natural resources.

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    Concretionist  over 2 years ago

    The power company DOES “give notice” of expected outages. But they sure don’t tell me in advance of UNexpected outages… and those often last longer, too!

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    BasilBruce  over 2 years ago

    Shouldn’t that be “Powers that are in the Universe”?

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    Imagine  over 2 years ago

    The Powers that Be or not to Be.

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    Robin Harwood  over 2 years ago

    Because electricity is more important.

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    blunebottle  over 2 years ago

    Rat, do you really want a warning?

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    Bullet Bronson Premium Member over 2 years ago

    Profound is not the word.

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    hariseldon59  over 2 years ago

    Sometimes the Powers That Be do send us warnings that we should take better care of our health. We don’t always listen.

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    iggyman  over 2 years ago

    Sometimes you get a warning, and if you do not heed it, your chances of sticking around might be lessened !

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    Troglodyte  over 2 years ago

    In a way, the power company has the “power of darkness”…how’s that for profundity, Rat? Now, don’t get profane!

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    Troglodyte  over 2 years ago

    In a way, the power company has the “power of darkness”…how’s that for profundity, Rat? Now, no need to use profanity! :D

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    Say What Now‽ Premium Member over 2 years ago

    Because the universe runs on cause and effect. We cannot process all the causes to determine all the effects.

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    einarbt  over 2 years ago

    Not sure I’d want a warning letter. I would have to start putting my affairs in order and that would kill me or I would party like its 1999 and that would kill me.

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    Gent  over 2 years ago

    Power company warns you before that? You must be living in a privileged territory.

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    Simon Seamount  over 2 years ago

    Because there are no conscious powers in the universe outside of the neural brains of organic creatures.

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    Brass Orchid Premium Member over 2 years ago

    The power company works for you. They warn you when you haven’t paid, because they want your money.

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    zerotvus  over 2 years ago

    according to the contract, we had to give three days notice before dying……

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    Count Olaf Premium Member over 2 years ago

    They don’t even warn you now, Mr Rat.

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    MathProf2  over 2 years ago

    How can I sign up for Rat’s power company???

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    YippiKiAyMofo  over 2 years ago

    Life’s a Rat, then you die.

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    Ellis97  over 2 years ago

    Well, do rats do have three or five years to live, so you could be gone any day now.

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    Snolep  over 2 years ago

    Is that Austin Powers?

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    uniquename  over 2 years ago

    They report to different authorities with different standards of operation.

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    DM2860  over 2 years ago

    You got your final notice that you were going to be disconnected right after your birth. You are just waiting for actual turn off.

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    chris_o42  over 2 years ago

    Good point, Rat!

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    Linguist  over 2 years ago

    What do you want rat? A voice coming out of the heavens saying: " This is your 2 Minute Warning … Get your sh*t together! "?

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    diskus Premium Member over 2 years ago

    People get warnings all the time, they chose to ignore them.

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    Zebrastripes  over 2 years ago

    RAT is trying to justify his reasoning….neva gonna happen…

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    royq27  over 2 years ago

    Well, the powers that be many times knock out my power without warning.

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    raybarb44  over 2 years ago

    You never paid your powers that be in the universe bill, so no notice when they turn it off……

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    WCraft Premium Member over 2 years ago

    Stuart and Raj from Big Bang Theory: Raj: “So have you contacted the power company about not having power at your house?” Stuart: “Yes, many times.” Raj: “And what do they say?” Stuart: “Pay your power bill!”

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    curtlyon19  over 2 years ago

    funny AND makes me think

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    Goat from PBS  over 2 years ago

    So… is death the equivalent of having no power?

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    tudza Premium Member over 2 years ago

    Because the power company is a regulated public utility. What you want to lose first, Rat, cat videos or all the power in your house?

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    caring55  over 2 years ago

    it’s the difference between beaurocracy and an all powerful tyrant

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    TSRaman  over 2 years ago

    The power company is profound. The Powers That Be in the Universe are prolost.

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    Cozmik Cowboy  over 2 years ago

    Genealogist joke:

    I found out that my great-grandfather not only knew when he was going to die, he knew how.

    Really?? How in the world could he know that?

    A judge told him.

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    zeexenon  over 2 years ago

    Or, like my wife and I, you could experience HOSPICE.

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    Buckeye67  over 2 years ago

    If Rat wants to appear profound, he better come up with a lot better analogy than that.

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    Thinkingblade  over 2 years ago

    Hmmm. I bought a generator for the house just because the power company doesn’t warn me …

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    johnschutt  over 2 years ago

    Dear Rat,If I told you, “I am the way, and the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me," would you believe me? You have your notice.Sincerely,Jesus

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    Bilan  over 2 years ago

    The power company does give you warning of an outage. They turn your electricity off for ten minutes as a ten minute warning.

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    eepeqez  over 2 years ago

    Possums.Not “opossums”, proper arboreal Australian possums who hate being on the ground. They love using powerlines to get about.And so, just as the power company has no control over possums, sometimes the powers-that-be just kill off the odd random rat without notice…

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    Sisyphos  over 2 years ago

    Rat, you are not so much profound as profane.

    As usual, Rat gives himself too much credit….

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    neilcopeland51  over 2 years ago

    “The powers that be” is an early 17th century expression meaning the human authorities.

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