Agnes by Tony Cochran for July 05, 2021

Yup! I’m with Trout.

Agnes is definitely not a coffee lover.

Aggiebucks Blended Java!

If Agnes accidentally stumbles onto one of the recipes for my Nuclear Coffee, there could be trouble

Agnes’ problem with making coffee, along with other supposed comestibles she prepares, is that she has never figured out…

or perhaps simply refuses to believe…

that the named food or beverage MUST be among the actual ingredients.

 

Which is to say, “coffee” must contain real coffee…

no matter how difficult it is to procure….

Just as a cheese sandwich must contain cheese, and bread.

 

Neither can be concocted… ever… from paint, plastic, caterpillars, or any other inedible items found in the woods, or in the dumpster.

Sounds like a crappy chino to me.

It’s burnt beans that make your breath stink. Lets see how close she gets to that.

Personally I prefer “perky” or “rise and shine”. Camphorated wet dog just misses something, truthful though it may be.

“Now, to find a camphorated wet dog…”

“Camphorated wet dog” – I love it! When I lived with a coffee drinker and coffee was brewing, my initial thought when the stench hit my nostrils was usually that the dog had had an accident. The two smells are remarkably similar.

I am thinking of a “Night Court” episode, where a street vendor struck it rich, selling pieces- parts of “formally living things.”(deep fried of course).

A huge disappointment for me early on was that brewed coffee didn’t taste anything like ground coffee smelled.

I made this comment on yesterday’s strip, regarding Agnes’ Fourth of July hot dogs:

I’d want to know exactly where the hot dogs came from, and how they were prepared, considering our past experiences with Agnes and food creation/preparation.

I rest my case.

For me, the way Agnes describes the smell of her “coffee” makes it sound better than the real thing. The smell of coffee makes me dizzy and sick to my stomach.

Here is an odd thing: all my life, the people I have been attracted to as friends (or more) all turned out to not like coffee either, so it was never an issue.

(time for a bit of a whine). I hate coffee. I always have. Never saw a reason for it to exist. I do have to drink it occasionally when my asthma doesn’t want to respond to my inhaler. I’ve managed to make it palatable by using chocolate syrup and creamer. But, I resent it.

Brown, skinny soup that smells of camphorated wet dog … doesn’t Starbucks have that copyrighted?