Brewster Rockit by Tim Rickard for March 03, 2021

Sure, blame your mother-in-law’s cooking. That’ll go well.

He should have quit the marriage while he was ahead.

The man, ’tis dead meat.

Two heads are better than….

Nah.

Less filling?

Insects and spiders eating their mate is natures form of child support.

Is she like a female praying mantis version of Jeff Dunham’s Achmed – she warned him, “Silence, …”

and then she got her wish (silence) … and is still not satisfied.

This whole thing has left a bad taste in her mouth.

He’s the headless Mantisian!

You knew he had bad taste when you married him.

But was he less filling?

So then, why does she eat him?

Unless we’re seeing a modern version of the tale of the fox and the scorpion.

I knew a mantis joke was coming. I was not disappointed.

I don’t think marriage counseling will help this problem? Funeral might, that and collecting on the life insurance.

The husband obviously has nothing to say in this marriage.

He should have joined the Sea Bees.

If he had hands, he could still communicate with his fingers. (I was referring to ASL.)

Pray, tell…

He was crazy to marry her in the first place: non compos mantis.

(It’s an old one, but somebody had to toss it in.)

He would have been OK if he just avoided sex.

Gary Larson is beaming from ear to ear.

On the plus side:

• He doesn’t complain about your cooking.

• He doesn’t leave the toilet seat up.

• He doesn’t hog the sheets at night.