Close to Home by John McPherson for February 23, 2021

Were those little alien boys up to something?

At this point I think a little paint and a little caulking isn’t going to cut it. But hey, at least you got a place go so to speak.

It’s a fixer upper.

At least there’s a toilet.

Still a $400,000 fixer upper in Southern California! I bet the realtor phoned a head to arrange the open house…a VERY open house,

Hmmmmm ,,,, areal fixer upper!!!!

So they had a choice to walk to bus stop to use the toilet or use it here

This listing will blow you away, just go on in and find a seat.

Bleeb says Hi.

Sort of like fixing a car by jacking up the radiator cap and driving a new car under it…

“And just look at those views! The best part?—You never have to clean the windows.”

Not much overhead.

Location. Location. Location. …but no

“Tornadoes? Very rare in these parts.”

And two bleeps

Behind you, Bleeb!

It’s what we call an open floor idea. Great cross ventilation. Sunny views. Close to nature.

I have another listing in your range, it just came on the market, needs a little more TLC but it’s right down town Portland.

Maybe Bleeb starting some recon???

Oh, there’s Kate Brown’s office.

Must be a foreclosure, people rip out everything and trash the places that are foreclosed.

Very, um…..outdoorsy

Please don’t open that door – I want my privacy.

The bus doesn’t stop here but it’s right on the route.

… ᴀɴᴅ ʜᴇʀᴇ’s ᴡʜᴀᴛ ᴀ ɢᴜʏ ᴡᴏᴜʟᴅ sᴀʏ…

“Excuse us for just a moment, I’d like to talk this over with my wife…

… Honey, it does have a toilet… and the toilet has a door in front of it, so I’d say that’s pretty much almost everything that you get in any other bathroom anywhere else… I know it’s a bit of a fixer-upper, but I say we make him an offer!”

Only one bathroom? Please show us something else.

Some assembly required

The house is a fixer-upper!

It’s a fixer upper….

That looks like a pretty solid door, so plenty of security.

Why is there a capital I in did?

Well it looks like Bleeb and Dalcon are it again

Looks like the big bad wolf huffed and puffed.

In this situation, you will want a basement.

And Dalcon says, “My work here is done”.

Waving back at you Bleeb! If this is what they call “house-flipping” where did the rest of the house go? :)

Are you here for the open house?

Sounds like the ex-President…

Very flexible floor plan. Lots of opportunities to customize to meet your family’s needs.

People who live in glass houses…are way ahead of these folks.

And then there is the folklore saying that a tornado never hits the same house twice…

Nice solid slab. Much better than the one we had in Flagstaff.

It was Auntie Em’s house settled down in Utah after the tornado picked it up. Strange feeling that we aren’t in Kansas anymore !!

Reminds me about an old Amos and Andy skit.