Looks Good on Paper by Dan Collins for January 11, 2021

I’ve been saying it for years…“If I weren’t afraid of needles you could hook me up to a morning coffee IV and I’d be a happy man!”

Sign me up!!!

I’m already well known for my Nuclear Coffee

Not that I haven’t thought about it, but this may be a bit extreme even for me

You miss being able to TASTE the coffee, that way. And really is is not for TRUE coffee lovers. True coffee lovers do not drink coffee to wake up, they wake up, just so they can drink coffee.

Yep! It’s Monday morning. Hook me up Scottie!

I have to get up, my coffee needs me.

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https://www.huffpost.com/entry/coffee-addict_n_4717456

You Know You’re Drinking Too Much Coffee When . .

Your first-aid kit contains two pints of coffee with an I.V. hookup.

You don’t tan, you roast.

You short out motion detectors.

You name your cats “Cream” and “Sugar.”

When someone says. “How are you?”, you say, “Good to the last drop.”

You’ve built a miniature city out of little plastic stirrers.

You don’t sweat, you percolate.

Juan Valdez named his donkey after you.

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No thanks, I’ll take mine the regular way so I can taste it!

Like cocaine, you body adjusts to it until you reach a threshold. Then you must take it just to keep the withdrawal symptoms away with no buzz.

I’ve never liked coffee. I tasted it by mistake when I was 4 (thought it prune juice, which I liked at the time, and it was in a clear bottle in the refrigerator) and again at the cub scouts meeting when I was 11. Threw up both times. Haven’t touched it since, thank goodness. My wife loves it, though. But she has good taste in men (me).

Inhaling the steam clears the sinuses.

At restaurants (ok, diners) I tell the waitress that that’s how we do our coffee in Minnesota.

Not being able to stick myself with needles is what’s kept me off of hard drugs…and mainlining coffee.

“Good to the last … drip”