Wizard of Id by Parker and Hart for December 04, 2020

I’ll take whatever can fuel the rocket to Saturn.

But he’s already wasting away!

Best solution is “barman gimme the most popular drink that is ordered”

Order three snakebites. The first two you drink. The third bite takes everything left in your wallet.

Reminds me of the bar tender who also ran a hardware store. He sometimes got his professions mixed up.

Call me blue collar, but I am not into the fancy cocktail crowd. I find it easy to remember to say, “Bartender, gimmie a beer.” Simplicity at its simplest.

“Whatever gets me drunk fastest…”

Hmmm… the Wizard of Id Classic strip today also features the jester. He has three bell tassels on his hat…

Those sound like the names of mod libations. Good as some out there.

If he can’t say it NOW, you don’t want to know what’s coming later!

Yup. Stick to beer.

A good bartender would figure out he means a margarita, and get one for him, if he is sober enough to sit on that stool, he can have another drink.

Gym an tunic for me, pleez.

“Shaken,not stirred”

He’ll have tee martunies to go

I have heard of (but not tried) a drink called “Freddie Fudpucker.” I understand the the best part is someone trying to say it after having a few.

(senses rudeness in the third panel of the cartoon)

Bet you can’t say Pan-Galactic Gargle Blaster three times fast.

Not as drunk as some thinkle peep.

Rule #1 is good.

It’s why most drunks drink beer.. and why I order my coffee black.

Amaretto on the rocks please

Margarita

Gimmie whatever you feel like making

When I lived in Boston, there was a restaurant/bar in Copley Square that I would go to. When the colleges were in session, you’d find a number of female guests there on a Friday/Saturday night. Invariably they’d order the fancy cocktails that were big in the 80’s. There was the one server who would ask them if they knew what went in the drink. If they told her what the ingredients were, she would accept the order. if not, she’d politely let them know that if they didn’t know what they were drinking, then they didn’t need to be drinking it. Imagine that happening in this day and age. I WAS REFUSE SERVICE!! I’M I’M GOING TO POST WHAT SHE SAID ON SOCIAL MEDIA, AND WANT HER FIRED!

You can tell when a person has had too much to drink by the way they say “sit” or “city”!

And if you ask for tee martoonies, I don’t want to hear about your heartburn.

A MAGA-Rita?

Sorry, she’s gone. Trump fired her. Didn’t wait for Biden.

Drink please?”

Irish. Neat.

That Jester shouldn’t be drinking.

It’s a Margarita, Bung. Repeat after me M…a…r…g…a…r…i…t…a.

It’s not that hard to say “Jack”