Tom Toles for May 29, 2020

“How Democracies Fail” was not supposed to be a tutorial.

Moscow Mitch is working hard to revive the poll tax!

Fascism lite.

It’s taken only one Orange-Obscenity would-be Joshua to blow his horn and bring down the wall of democracy while building his wall of hate and exclusion. Only one. How could we have been so stupid?

Reducing the Turnout – {4 beats/line}

They’re grabbing “democracy” by the throat,

as they strive to reduce the number who vote, …

… thereby sinking the Democrats’ boat,

so The Donald might possibly stay afloat, -

- and preen in his mirror and prance and gloat.

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

{re Racist troubles in Minneapolis}

Fascist Reprobates – {1.20 limericks}

The prez exacerbates // deplorable alt-right hates.

He vindicates // and validates,

and thereupon stimulates // the fascist reprobates.

. . . . . . . . . . . . . .

It’s so apropos that Toles’ elephant heads look like inverted KKK hoods.

They’ll do anything to win…remember that!

Remember, NOTHING is too low, too sleazy, or UTTERLY ILLEGAL for the Republicans to try to make sure that they win, since they KNOW they cannot win an honest Election. Period!

(Take-off from “Smiles,” by J. Will Callahan, Lee S. Roberts)

“Smirks”

Verse:

Donald, we discern / Your campaign’s taken a bad turn,

A hundred thousand humans dead / Give us great concern.

Donald, it looks bad; / We know you’re no Sir Galahad,

So we’ll downplay the Covid deaths, / You just play a smirking cad:

.

Chorus:

You have smirks in repertory,

You have mocks and derisive sneers —

Use them in your raucous rallies,

And they’ll bring on MAGA cheers.

.

Main-in voting fraud’s a winner,

Obama “lies” are great to spew,

Just ignore the Great Pandemic

And economic bad news, too.

.

Verse:

Donald dearie, not to worry — / We’ll fix this all up if we hurry,

The Lie Machine is up and spinning, / True issues turning blurry.

Donald, bring up Michael Flynn / How the Deep State did him in!

And Biden felt up on a broad! / And that witch in Michigan!

.

Chorus:

You can do it, buckle down, Sir,

Rev up your snarky charm;

Pass on BS you find on Twitter

And to your opponents do much harm.

.

Your smirks are much belov’ed,

Your sheeple beg for you to shear

The ones they so much like to hate and,

So, just tell them lies they want to hear.

“I’ve come to a place where I’ve come to the conclusion that the only good Democrat is a dead Democrat,” says Couy Griffin, founder of Cowboys for Trump, and New Mexico’s Otero County commissioner. The president tweeted the video. I suppose the next order will be “When the voting starts, the shooting starts.” /TS

Trump again abusing power.

https://www.cnn.com/2020/05/29/politics/donald-trump-twitter-power-personal-whims/index.html

I will vote and not for you

Get the red out, vote blue 2020. All the way down the ballot, city council, school board, dog catcher if your jurisdiction has party affiliation listed for such offices. If not, find out and again, get the red out, vote blue 2020 and beyond.

Republicans are suing California for putting in extra voting booths and mailing out ballots. That tells you everything you should know.

Lying racist Republicans only win through vote suppression, the majority hate them.

Order issues from the barrel of a gun, right, fascists?

I thought it said You shouldn’t Vote.

Forget Pink Elephants (though many Republican voters see them more often than they see their families), it’s TREASONOUS Elephants on parade!

Okay, this was originally a reply to our poet laureate, Old Curmudgeon (and my reply to our second poet laureate Praise_Of_Folly will be coming around the mountain………if I can find the mountain………..), but the childish “show-offy” streak in me made me post it here (I hope I don’t forget to remember to regret being sorry for regretting to remember……….sorry, I lost interest!) And here we go:

We all live in a sinking submarine

Our admirals love their stinking tonic gin

{with apologies to Kip W. and come BACK, Kip, we miss you!]

We can’t overcome the over-all

Without our Adderall

Without our daddy’s bean

We were born

(Although it’s tragic)

And our daddy’s crimes

Vanished like magic

But the point is, thusly thus

Re-elect us—what’s the fuss?

One of the few times Disaster Pumpkin ever told the truth was when he said (I paraphrase) “When too many people vote, we lose.”

{Off-topic:}

Dissing Trump’s Base – {limerick}

His fans heed Fox, hence they’re dumb;

so to Trump they submit and succumb, -

- which gives us such anger

that we shoot ‘em the fanger

and at ‘em our noses we thumb.

… Coda: – {4 beats/line}

His base’s embrace // lets him disgrace

and deface and debase // then displace and erase

our nation from history’s quite eminent place.

. . . . . .

The Electoral College is the only thing getting Republican into the White House since 1988. What does that say about their candidates, policy and ethics?

{Off-topic}

A Stunted/blunted Soul/mind – {4 beats/line}

In terms of “empathy” his soul is stunted,

and in several ways his mind is blunted.

These conditions MUST be confronted; – - -

- – - His base simply MUST no longer enable

this defective soul who’s MUCH too unstable

and too MUCH a tyrant in a Grimm Brothers fable.

. . . . . . . . . . .

RNC Chair Ronna McDaniel repeatedly voted by mail — before suing California for expanding the practice

https://www.rawstory.com/2020/05/rnc-chair-ronna-mcdaniel-repeatedly-voted-by-mail-before-suing-california-for-expanding-the-practice/

Can’t, not Couldn’t.

It’s still happening.

Riots in the streets. Army called in. 40 million unemployed. Over 100,000 dead.

Is Trump finished making America Great Again?

To the cartoonist: Mr. Toles, your political cartoons are extraordinary. You get many “likes” but almost none on your one-panel “Randolph Itch 2 a.m.” — which are apolitical but outstanding irony. Do your fans not know of this? (I just told them. Where is your agent?)

I’m pretty sure Mr. Toles’s agent counsels him to NOT rock the boat………but Toles has rocked so many boats so effectively over so many decades (yes, I remember “Space Captain Reagan”!) that I’d have to think that he puts art over commerce………….

And, yes, Randoph Itch should be twice as popular as hallf the Oscars—and THEN some!

It is NOT too soon to check on whether you’re still registered. It’s NOT too soon to organize with like minded people to help enable the vote for each other… and by my preference, everybody else too. It’s NOT too soon to realize that when/if you DO get to vote, you must vote all the way down the ballot because those lower offices and measures are the ones that affect YOU, locally (so STUDY UP!). And it’s NOT too soon to get an ACLU activist group on speed dial, just in case.

How long before the Democrats start referring to themselves as “the REAL party of Lincoln”?