Non Sequitur by Wiley Miller for April 02, 2020

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    eastern.woods.metal  almost 4 years ago

    And died of a heart attack from all the excitement

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    Concretionist  almost 4 years ago

    My spouse actually lets me have scissors. Of course my knees prevent running…

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    Odd Dog Premium Member almost 4 years ago

    Hey at least those stair’s are going up and not down.

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    Lyons Group, Inc.  almost 4 years ago

    Well, where you are now, you don’t have to worry about that (as well as viruses).

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    Bilan  almost 4 years ago

    The moral of the story: If you rip off your coat and tie and shout “Today’s the day baby!”, you go to heaven.

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    Bryan Farht  almost 4 years ago

    I never did anything wrong except for now… ??? Yeah, right.

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    gopher gofer  almost 4 years ago

    his only regret is that he never got to juggle chainsaws…

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    GiantShetlandPony  almost 4 years ago

    … “Today’s the day, Baby!” and promptly stepped in front of a bus?

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    in.amongst  almost 4 years ago

    One way or another – he stepped in it.

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    Kind&Kinder  almost 4 years ago

    That’s when his wife’s lover shot him!

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    WoodstockJack  almost 4 years ago

    You know, if you eat right, go to bed early, avoid stress, practice good hygiene and try to travel safely, you die in a nursing home after years of moaning and boredom.If you forget all that shite and merely live as a responsible adult, doing what you please, you may die a few years earlier and miss all that “fun.”

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    basspro  almost 4 years ago

    Death and taxes, my friends. Stay safe!

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    Dobby53 Premium Member almost 4 years ago

    “You’ll be on your way up! You’ll be seeing great sights! You’ll join the high fliers who soar to high heights.” or "“You have brains in your head. You have feet in your shoes. You can steer yourself any direction you choose.” Dr Seuss.

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    e.groves  almost 4 years ago

    “Always lived a very quiet life, I ain’t never did no wrong.” Elvis.

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    Oldgrowth  almost 4 years ago

    The fellow apparently tried to catch up too quickly. If one wants to live free of cautions, one should start small and early. It takes practice, and you recover quicker when younger. Carpe diem… https://www.goodreads.com/quotes/47188-life-should-not-be-a-journey-to-the-grave-with

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    kartis  almost 4 years ago

    Isn’t it ironic.

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    Redd Panda  almost 4 years ago

    It’s better to burn out, than fade away. At the same time, there’s no profit in stupidity. Gotta find that balance between the two.

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    dflak  almost 4 years ago

    When I get there, St. Peter’s going to ask, “You look terrible. What the hell happened to you!” I’ll respond, “Yeah, but it was one hell of a ride!”

    As I look back on my life now, I have no regrets. I’ve made my share of mistakes, but I am still having fun.

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    vaughnrl2003 Premium Member almost 4 years ago

    Yup, it gets us every time. We toe the line, obey the rules while others around us do whatever they want and get away with it. Let us roll through one stinking stop sign and POW! Sheesh!

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    Michael Helwig  almost 4 years ago

    Unfortunately he didn’t wash his hands afterwards.

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    john_chubb  almost 4 years ago

    Just another YODO bird.

    You Only Die Once.

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    Kaputnik  almost 4 years ago

    I used to go running with scissors, but they could never keep up. So I started running with hedge clippers instead.

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    ahnk_2000  almost 4 years ago

    “And they cliiiimbing a staaaiiirway, to heaveeeeeen.”

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    Wizard of Ahz-no relation  almost 4 years ago

    wiley did a better one a few years ago of a man in a swim suit, skis a rubber floaty and party hat at the pearly gates with a sign hung on it saying “I’ll be back as soon as i can stop laughing”

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    Kilrwat Premium Member almost 4 years ago

    Always listen to your Mother!

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    marilynnbyerly  almost 4 years ago

    Death can be a b*tch. Don’t tempt it with arrogant human stupidity.

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    Rev Phnk Ey  almost 4 years ago

    Looks like this is the segregated stairway.

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    Linguist  almost 4 years ago

    " Well, I guess I won’t be trying that again! "

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    sandpiper  almost 4 years ago

    According to an unknown writer: Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, chocolate in one hand, martini in the other, body thoroughly used up, totally worn out and screaming "WOO HOO what a ride! That definitely would be one way to be remembered.

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    GreenT267  almost 4 years ago

    “Don’t go swimming for 90/60/30 minutes after you eat” is a myth. It was first published in 1908 Boy Scout manual but no source for that has been found. There is no evidence that swimming has any different affect on a full stomach than any other form of exercise. Of course, it’s not good practice to stuff yourself and then run or swim or play football – your digestive system can only do so much when the rest of your body is super active. Here’s hoping we all can get back to the pools, tracks, gyms, and ball fields soon!

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    rlaker22j  almost 4 years ago

    too many before reaching 62 money goes back into the pot retire at 62 I did been retired for 10 years loving it

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    33Angel  almost 4 years ago

    Oooooopsy! It didn’t end the way he intended… :D

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    Lablubber   almost 4 years ago

    I’m the midnight bomber what bombs at midnight but needed a longer fuse baby!

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    russellc64  almost 4 years ago

    So he died running with scissors immediately after a meal to swim in the pool in the middle of the street?

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    JohnHarry Premium Member almost 4 years ago

    Wiley: Please send the original to Trump -promise him unlimited gold and virgins.

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    JenSolo02  almost 4 years ago

    Given the gravitas of the current medical crisis, I’d say the timing of this cause of death comic was morbid.

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    erniejpdx  almost 4 years ago

    Nothing worse than swimming with scissors.

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    Enter.Name.Here  almost 4 years ago

    Just be happy you are ascending.

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    jimboklein  almost 4 years ago

    Isn’t it funny that in our elementary school classrooms, our teachers preached safety, such as not running with scissors, yet in the back of the room there was a giant guillotine (a.k.a paper cutter) which you could practically decapitate a classmate.

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    COL Crash  almost 4 years ago

    He just forgot to watch out for that bus.

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    eastern.woods.metal  almost 4 years ago

    " Here, hold my beer "

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    Cactus-Pete  almost 4 years ago

    Do people still believe the “swimming after eating” nonsense?

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    JudyAz  almost 4 years ago

    The 2nd, 3rd, and 4th person in line seem real happy to be there!

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    SusanMagee  almost 4 years ago

    This one first came out on June 13, 1997… it on my birthday, reflected me perfectly, and has been on my refrigerator ever since to remind me to play a little more…

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    Ka`ōnōhi`ula`okahōkūmiomio`ehiku Premium Member almost 4 years ago

    The REAL Stairway to Heaven!

    https://www.journeyera.com/stairway-to-heaven-oahu-hawaii/

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    cherns Premium Member almost 4 years ago

    https://images.app.goo.gl/hpiGnf2aTWAZiz7r8 from the 1946 Powell/Pressburger film A Matter or Life and Death (aka Stairway to Heaven in the US)

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    Bicycle Dude  almost 4 years ago

    Better late than never.

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    bakana  almost 4 years ago

    So, he never had Any Fun?

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    j.l.farmer  almost 4 years ago

    there are things i wished i had done throughout my life but not having done them i don’t know what i missed.

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