B.C. by Mastroianni and Hart for February 05, 2020

You could also just step on him…….,

John likes the turned tables!

He gets to be the bat for a change instead of the baseball.

Sometimes it’s better to push the wheelchair than to be riding it.

Snail [Thinking]: “And I left living in a pineapple and with a sponge for this!”

Tailgater.

Be careful that he doesn’t suddenly hit his brakes…

Be careful that the snail doesn’t get in a fit of road rage!

“If yer gonna homestead, move closer to the water!”

And it doesn’t become any more pleasant slogging through that slime he leaves!

This is what happens to me when I’m on the interstate heading off to work and some old retired person decides he/she is going to take a scenic morning drive (going about 45 or 50) (Yes; I know I need to learn more patience… [in case I live long enough to be old and turn into one of them]).

“Drive like you had someplace to go!”, my impatient dad used to say.

LOL!

Turtle road rage is a wonder to behold. Sort of a hazard though. I hear the snail is packing.

What did the snail riding on the back of the turtle say? “Wheeeee!”

Hello, Pot?

I had a buddy who had terrible road rage. He was just like this. I hated it when he drove, scared the crap outta me.

Would this be snail gating?

OH. MY. GOD. Male drivers in The Villages, FL. Whether they’re on a motorcycle, in a vintage car, or pushing a shopping cart down the aisles. . .not to mention golf carts, although those zip in and out, drivers waving a middle finger. . .

Early rush hour traffic..

Move it or milk it

Actually, Illinois drivers get much closer so their high-beams achieve the most irritation possible. I’ve figured out how to protect my rear view DVR camera from the glare to get a clear view of the driver for my face-recognition software (cap usually on backwards) and plate.

This could get ugly…

… I wonder how long the skids marks would be.

Reminds me of a mailman joke. A mailman was pulling up in his truck to check on his buddy who was walking the block delivering. Just as he pulled up to him the walking mailman angrily stomped on a snail. The mailman in the truck said, “Now why did you do that?” He responded, “That guy,” pointing at the now dead snail, “has been following me ALL DAY!”

We had Road Runner, now it’s Tailgate Turtle

He’s shell gating.

That snail is adorable.