Non Sequitur by Wiley Miller for September 19, 2019

I knew that guy…

Just like cars that came in base trim usually outsold the models with all the options, women are the standard human model. Men are the more expensive models for Nature to create and maintain.

It’s more impressive when a male survives to old age.

The carver left off, “Hold my beer”.

Man, the sh!t got real…

Don’t answer that!

One of the finer things about maturity is that my desire to out-Testosterone some other guy has receded to the point where I have a fighting chance of being rational. Instead.

“Hey, Y’all… WATCH THIS….”

I wonder why this tired old joke idea keeps coming back. The first 10-20 times was enough.

Men die first as they chose to do so, nice and peaceful, no more honey do crapola.

The winner is not the one who lives the longest, but the one who has the most fun.

Two intrepid lads went ATVing last night and earned their Darwins. Drove off a cliff. I am supposed to feel bad for them. I admire their achievement instead.

His last words: well-just-you know—damn!

R I P

That tombstone should read “Hey, watch how a real jackass does it!”

Because men have women to nag them – says I, as I retreat to my bunker wearing my flame-proof Kevlar suit.

It’s not the quantity but the quality of life that matters.

Hey, I’d rather die trying than trying not to die! You can stay hidden in your shell, senorita. Men get things done!

A LOT of the comments here prove something I’ve believed for a long time: some men will put up with anything for sex. Geez, guys. . .

Well, I always thought that since women could create life, they had more to begin with.

That should have been on my ex-brother-in-law’s tombstone! Gone, but unfortunately, not forgotten.

Husbands die before their wives because they want to.

Why do most men die before their wives? Because they WANT to!

Scientists have discovered that the reason wives live longer than their husbands is because they aren’t married to women. (Colin Mochrie joke from Whose Line Is It Anyway?)

This is one of the reasons that makes us Males different from Females so the radical feminists that think we are the same should just stop.

Paleontologists are considering this as the reason they find so many more male fossils than those of females.

The second line would read “What could possibly go wrong?”