Non Sequitur by Wiley Miller for July 16, 2019

I think I hear/read this joke on average about 20 times a day in the press. Then even its philosophy is gone.

Could I have just the middle half full?

Why does the waiter resemble Penn Jillette?

Just give them the bottle and let them decide.

Just bring me a gallon jug of “Gallo”

Highest paying gig he could get with that degree.

“Professor Descartes, would you care for some dessert?”… “I think not”… poof, he was gone

Just fill the top half, please.

nice….art….on the wall.very minimalist

paintings even I could create, if someone else did the framing.

On second thoughts, I’ll have a large full glass of Merlot.

Half full or half empty? It doesn’t matter. Just as long as it’s never empty.

There’s a difference in the way they’re served.

Half full: waiter takes glass and pours wine into it until it’s half full then serves it

Half empty: waiter takes glass and pours wine into it until it is full, drinks half of the wine then serves it. yum – backwash!

I know a guy with a master in philosophy…he said “Yes. And I know nothing, but I Know that I know nothing.”

I think there is a parallel to he 2 questions. "May I help you? "Versus “what do you want?”

The former being more open to possibilities.The latter is more confined comparatively.

As people tend to prefer the former version of the question, it should naturally follow that, in order to be open to the possibilities, the focus should be on the empty space. And not the wine.

I.e. I prefer it to be half empty.

No! Full!

I drink, therefore I am.

… with a Ph.D. in cognitive psychology.

Apes quote philosophy?

The idea of pessimist versus optimist is faulty. Do you need to finish what’s in the glass (like before a medical scan & you HATE the stuff, or is it a cold drink on a hot day. I read a quote some place "are you pouring or drinking?).

Well, that is probably one of the best uses of a Philosophy degree I can think of. I have a history degree. I would have to ask if the customer had a preference in the age of the wine. Millennial, Pepsi, Boomer or earlier.

Sadly, so many university degrees don’t lead into any sort of viable career. At least he’s not working at a fast food joint. Hey, maybe he could go to a trade school.

Why dirty a glass? Just give me the bottle, we’ll rough it.

Why can’t restaurants fill the damn glass?

Depends on the second of the minute of the hour of the day of the week of the month of the year. . .my attitude changes “secondly”

Old comic strip rerun….02 June 2015.

I thought those people with advanced Philosophy degrees became taxi drivers and barbers, while English and Psychology majors became bartenders.

I want a glass half full but twice as large.

I won’t need my math degree to calculate your 0% tip.

My mom once told me that a B.S = Bu!! Sh!&, M.S. = More Sh!&, and Ph.D. = Piled higher and Deeper!

He needs to attain his PhD.

Bring it to me full, and I’ll return it to you empty. No half measures, please…

… and yes, I’d like fries with that.

Love the ponytail!

Rubbish. I have a Ph.D. in Cog Psych. I’m making six figures lecturing.

I’d prefer a cold Hefeweizen, please.

Good one Mr. Wiley, show us one for an Art Appreciation degree!!! LOL

I would like the glass to be 51% full, thank you.

“You mean I have a choice?”

The blue-collar person says “I can make that work.”

The engineer says “I wonder how that works”

The physicist says “I wonder why that works”

The philosopher says “Do you want fries with that?”

Copyright infringement! This same cartoon was first published 6-2-15 © WILEY INK, Inc. and 7-16-19 is © WILEY INK, Ltd.

Either way would be great since they usually fill it about ⅓ full!

It’s full either way. Depends on what you’re measuring.

The other patron (where’s his tie? what kind of restaurant is this?) looks as if he’s eating a turkey drumstick as finger food.

It’s Half Full Before the First Sip.

Half Empty After. Unless it’s a Bad Wine.

I’d like it to be refillable.

Just the top half, please.

That’s his day job, during his off season Teller.