That is Priceless by Steve Melcher for May 31, 2019

Yes, she’s telling you there’s something on your lip.

Corrine, waiting for her ‘friend’ to take a bite of the arsenic laden pastry.

“Yes, a full glass of Sherry makes both breakfast with you and these Pop-Tarts a lot easier to take.”

Shelly self conscious of the huge pussy cold sore on her lip.

Hey, don’t bite your hangnail here.

Why is it that every blind date I get set up with picks their nose?

“You baked how much into these edibles?”

“It’s this tooth right here that’s crooked. It’s kept me from ever getting a date. Some have insinuated that it’s my lack of personality and some poor personal sanitary practices, but no, it’s this tooth”

“Wow, these are the best special muffins I’ve tasted since it became legal.”

“No Matilda, it says right here on the label, ‘Vaginal Cream’, not ‘Virginal Cream’. Once you’ve lost it, it’s gone!”

“Hmmm…you’re right. It does taste funny. Wait, isn’t your ex-husband the cook here?”

“Botox—it’s all the rage!”

“The worst pies in London….”

“Yes, Gertrude, it’s baby spit-up. Notice I use my left shoulder. The other side is for Gus.”

These winters are so dry; thank god Carmex.

and upon further examination , it not a fingernail at all.

it’s a toenail

As afternoon tea was about to wind up Matilda thought to herself, “You ain’t stickin’ me with the bill this time sister!”

You throw another marshmellow at me and you’re dead.

For the “big bucks” she always did hanker/ she was hoping to marry a banker/ but the chaps “in the chips”/ shied away from those lips/ when they spotted that hideous canker.

In the Restaurant: 

https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:David_Oyens_002.jpg 

has info and links that point to info about this roughly jumbo envelope size painting.

https://www.the-athenaeum.org/people/detail.php?ID=9648 

https://www.dordrechtsmuseum.nl/kunstenaars/oyens-david/ 

http://www.frans-kapma-foundation.com/Templates/david.html#davidO 

all have info, or links that point to more info, about this artist (the 2nd in Dutch; again, Chrome can automatically translate, plus it better formats the last than some other browsers do), perhaps in addition to what’s pointed to by the first URL. This is the first work by him used here.

Again, a larger strip image is shown by clicking the image in Mr. Melcher’s MASTERPIECE #2213 (May 30, 2019) blog entry, accessible by the Check out the blog! box after the last comment.

The only thing worse than finding a worm, is finding half a worm.

I don’t mean to startle you, but I think your hanky just moved.

“So, I says to her, I says, ‘That ain’t no valid interpretation of Hegel.’ And then she lets me have one on the kisser.”

April and MAY taste a Aperitif of birth control jell be fore engaging in sex.

“Oh no, seriously…. did that guy over there see me picking my teeth?”