Non Sequitur by Wiley Miller for July 04, 2018

She must have been married to a lawyer.

Love lost labor?

She just wants to make sure that it is a hell of a deep ditch!

Everyone said he was shallow.

That’ll be one less participant in the zombie apocalypse.

For extra security, call in the cement truck.

At a Jewish funeral, they lower the casket and friends take the shovel and throw in a scoop of dirt. Some do it to accept the finality of death. Some do it to show support by symbolically helping fill the grave. Some do it to add a couple more scoops to make sure he stays down there.

Well….there is the Sky Burial alternative.

Melania, 2025.

When something is too good to be true, it is best to take precautions.

When I die, I’m not going to hell. Satan has a restraining order against me.

Don’t forget to use a safety coffin. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Safety_coffin

You can also use concrete to fill it in. That way you know that he won’t come back.

I’m reminded of when they were burying the loquacious ( and argumentative ) Irish playwright, Brendan Behan. His younger brother, poet Dominic, looked down in the hole and said: " Ah, Brendan, Brendan, I’ve finally got in the last word ! "

I’ve been to the funeral of a drunken wife abuser, and it’s painful watching the minister try to think of something to say.

Cremation is a safer bet.

Or a sparsely-attended one…

Off topic comment: Happy Independence Day.

Hey, how’s about a strip where the husband is burying the wife. Oh that’s right never happens, they drive us to the grave.

The funeral home never had a request for a stake through the heart before.

The preacher said “You all knew the deceased. Do any of you have any kind words to say over him?”

“no”

Can we regain OUR independence by deeply burying …greed…fear mongering…….

Unless this guy was really tall the perspective of the drawing is way off.

This ’toon reminds me of a page in a book of insults. There was a tombstone engraved with:

“Here lies Ezekiel Aikle, aged 102. The good die young.”

They used to tie a piece of rope to the corpse’s Hand and run it up from the Coffin to a Bell.

If he managed to ring the Bell, they might dig him back up.

Sometimes, the Widow might get caught cutting the rope.

Out of sight, out of mind.

I’m avoiding this situation by being cremated, and having my ashes scattered off of Half Dome, in Yosemite national park.

“Dearly beloved, everyone grab a shovel.”

In New Orleans they have to be careful or the coffins come floating back up out of the ground.

Not good when it’s Apocalypse time!