Pearls Before Swine by Stephan Pastis for May 28, 2018

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    BE THIS GUY  almost 6 years ago

    I can’t bother to get up early enough to punch the early risers.

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    knight1192a  almost 6 years ago

    Sorry Rat, but many of the early risers beat the tar out of punchers like you while your just getting up.

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    Dirty Dragon  almost 6 years ago

    I thought the two types of people in the world were people with loaded guns, and people who dig.

    “You dig.”

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    ND Cool Z  almost 6 years ago

    Please don’t punch me, Rat! I have to wake up before dawn every day this month for the Sahur meal in Ramadan. (Yes, I’m a Muslim)

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    PICTO  almost 6 years ago

    There are only two types of people in the world…Those who believe the world can be divided into two types and those who don’t.

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    Jabroniville Premium Member almost 6 years ago

    My old roommate was like that. He’d be up and screeching about, singing to himself and making a racket when everyone else was being surly and grouchy. I wanted to murder him.

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    erik.vanthienen  almost 6 years ago

    As long as they stay quiet, I feel no need to harm any early riser …

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    Alexander the Good Enough  almost 6 years ago

    If it’s the early that bird catches the worm, why’d the worm get out of bed?

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    Alexander the Good Enough  almost 6 years ago

    It’s early to bed,

    And early to rise,

    And your girl’ll go out

    With other guys!

    Honey, let me be your salty dog…

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    Yakety Sax  almost 6 years ago

    There is one thing I have never taught my body how to do and that is to figure out at 6 A.M. what it wants to eat at 6 P.M. Erma Bombeck

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    serithinflight  almost 6 years ago

    There are two types of people in this world. Those that can extrapolate from incomplete data.

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    Jeff0811  almost 6 years ago

    The best thing about being a morning person is never having to set/wake up to your alarm. I have to be up by 6:00 every morning, usually up by 4:30 at the latest. I get a headache if I try to sleep and I’m not tired.

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    jpayne4040  almost 6 years ago

    I’ve always been a morning person, even as a young child—-and if you try to punch me, Rat, I will beat the living crap out of you!

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    dlkrueger33  almost 6 years ago

    Just like JPayne4040 said…since childhood, I have been an early riser. Now that I’m retired, I get up even EARLIER, between 4:30-5am. It feels GREAT to get a jump on the day (and ready Go Comics with a cup of coffee). LOL

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    F-Flash  almost 6 years ago

    Only 2 types who sleep that late, Bad Girls & Burglars.

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    Chief Inspector   almost 6 years ago

    The two types of people are those that can extrapolate from incomplete data.

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    jessie d. Premium Member almost 6 years ago

    A large proportion of the punchers seem to be the males of our species. And during te day, they are able to sleep at the drop of a hat. And since the female works for less while doing the same job, the men must be financially rewarded for that there sleeping.

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    Radish the wordsmith  almost 6 years ago

    I’ve been getting up at 4:20 every morning.

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    Packratjohn Premium Member almost 6 years ago

    I have a black Lab who can tell time. 5:30 seems to be her favorite barking time.

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    Nyckname  almost 6 years ago

    https://i.chzbgr.com/full/8392816640/h3D7EE661/

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    GROG Premium Member almost 6 years ago

    Prepare to be punched back…and kneed.

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    garcoa  almost 6 years ago

    Us late risers can do our punching (and making annoying sounds) around midnight.

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    mdherring65  almost 6 years ago

    Pretty good! I was hoping the guard duck would make an appearance and do something for Memorial Day in remembrance of those who served and gave the ultimate sacrifice.

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    nosirrom  almost 6 years ago

    I’m not an early riser, but I get up before Dawn everyday. She likes to sleep until noon. ;-)

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    Lablubber   almost 6 years ago

    It’s too early for this argument.

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    trivers  almost 6 years ago

    Morning people are hard to love.

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    marilynnbyerly  almost 6 years ago

    I have no problem with early risers. Somebody needs to bake the breakfast biscuits and other stuff. They also have started the coffee so I’m less likely to punch them for being so cheerful. Plus, there’s always noisy revenge from those of us with insomnia or a weird sleeping schedule.

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    Kveldulf  almost 6 years ago

    A friend has started working from 11:00 PM to 7:00 AM. I have to call her every night to wake her up to go to work. It can take as long as fifteen minutes of phone calls and I once had to drive to her place and pound on the door.

    They call it the graveyard shift for good reason.

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    Sailor46 USN 65-95  almost 6 years ago

    There two types of people, those that want you to succeed, and those who are afraid you will.

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    I hate cats.  almost 6 years ago

    I FINALLY SOLVED MY RUBIX CUBE!!! IT TOOK ME 3 YEARS!!

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    I hate cats.  almost 6 years ago

    There are two types of people in this world. People who will fall out of planes, and the people that push them

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    Sisyphos  almost 6 years ago

    Count me among Rat’s Punchers! I loathe mornings, period. Early morning risers are too sanctimonious for their own good….

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    SkyFisher  almost 6 years ago

    The greatest sin of morning people, is insisting that everyone ought to be just like them.

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    Ignis Atramento  almost 6 years ago

    There are two types of people in the world: morning people and society.

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    SuperCharged5-  about 2 years ago

    there are two types of people in this world… those who wake up early and those who are forced to wake up early

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