Pearls Before Swine by Stephan Pastis for May 20, 2018

They only jump off of bridges that are built from locally grown organic material.

tough

Truth be told— The only rats who are allowed and appreciated in parks are BUSHY-TAILED rats.

I thought also sober vegans jumped off cliffs. Is that what lemmings are?

Then of course, a movie would be nice. “Animal Farm”, or “Dr. DolIttle”, maybe.

Oh my, this was a sour one here. This Sunday strip that is. You can do better than that, Pastis!!

There is a comedy sketch I heard on the Dr. Demento Show long ago, describing rats in a hilarious way. Don’t know the artist, but it began something like this: “The rat. The rat. It’s invading our streets, searching for eats, beating up children and stealing their treats.”Best part of the sketch went something like this:“Down in the sewers it searches for food, picking at things which are brownish and crude. It jaunts through streets, knocking on doors. Beware, my friends, or next it’s yours.”

Stay thirsty my friend, and hungry too.

Stephan’s idea of a joke— a Rat and a Goat walk into a bar…..sorry —new brew pub….

I think they put on a skin tight spandex outfit and go bike riding.

Denial gives one sainthood and that’s a mental buzz unto itself.

in my newspaper this morning, panels 4-7 are out of order. makes for an interesting read.

Here’s goat coming up with all the great ideas for fun and rat putting the kibosh on them. Bit of role reversal.

When I was a vegan (now I’m vegetarian-many years ago my soon-to-be-wife brought some Ben & Jerry’s into the house and I reverted) I still occasionally drank more than 4 or 5 beers. I’ve since realized that I like to stay in control of my faculties and hangovers are one of worst things ever. Dr. Adams, however, has strongly recommended that I drink 2 or 3 beers once in a while (as long as it’s good beer) and I concur. My intoxicant of choice is the evil weed which I’ve been smoking (not continuously) since 1972. With three young (9, 5 &3) very active boys I find that it’s not in the best interests of anyone that I partake while they’re awake. Picture: "Oh, wow man! Aaron Jerry is throwing Matthew Garcia off the counter. I hope he hits the pillows. Now, where are those M & Ms? " So, I think I do okay as a mostly sober vegetarian. Even I can’t imagine life as a sober vegan.

Change doctors.

Well, at least one isn’t. Thank you.

If Goat’s typical walk is the one you see while on a short conversation, I’m not surprised Rat couldn’t keep up.

Just as a point of information, refraining from eating red meat does not make a person a vegan. It doesn’t even make them vegetarian.

Speaking as a very sober vegan, life isn’t all about consumption. There’s sharing with friends, exploring the world, learning new things and making fun of people who like to eat buzzard food while getting drunk.

Of course there’s more to life then red meat and beer: chips! But they’re off the menu too.

Since when does Goat ask Rat to the pub? Isn’t it normally vice-versa?

Just lie there and ponder those tough philosophical questions, Rat. When Enlightenment hits you, roll with the punch….

It looks like they are shortening some of the strips. I come here because they always published the whole strip. I went thru a whole thing with them and they insisted that never shortened strips. They have done that with this and Pickles. Do they ever see what people are commenting about in these remarks?

No, they eat artificial food produced by child labor in a non environmentally friendly way and pretend it makes them superior to others.

Wait, I thought Goat didn’t drink? He said so in an earlier strip, I think.

As a sober vegetarian who dislikes fried food, I can tell you, Rat: we hang out, go to school or work, date… Normal things. Jumping off things is for lemmings and those with depression who need to get help