The Crocodile
Went to the dentist
And sat down in the chair.And the dentist said “Now tell me, sir,
Why does it hurt and where?”
And the Crocodile said, “I’ll tell you the truth,
I have a terrible ache in my tooth,”
And he opened his jaws so wide, so wide,
That the dentist, he climbed right inside,
And the dentist laughed, “Oh isn’t this fun?”
As he pulled the teeth out, one by one.
And the Crocodile cried, “You’re hurting me so!
Please put down your pliers and let me go.”
But the dentist just laughed with a ho ho ho,
And he said, “I still have twelve to go—
Oops, that’s the wrong one, I confess,
But what’s one crocodile’s tooth, more or less?”
Then suddenly, the jaws went SNAP,
And the dentist was gone, right off the map,
And where he went one could only guess…
To North or South or East or West…
He left no forwarding address.
But what’s one dentist, more or less?
A man goes to his dentist because he feels something wrong in his mouth. The dentist examines him and says, “That new upper plate I put in for you six months ago is eroding. What have you been eating?”
The man replies, “All I can think of is that about four months ago my wife made some asparagus and put some stuff on it that was delicious Hollandaise sauce. I loved it so much I now put it on everything – meat, toast, fish, vegetables, everything.”
“Well,” says the dentist, “That’s probably the problem. Hollandaise sauce is made with lots of lemon juice, which is highly corrosive. It’s eaten away your upper plate. I’ll make you a new plate, and this time use chrome.”
“Why chrome?” asks the patient.
To which the dentist replies, “It’s simple. Everyone knows that there’s no Plate like Chrome for the Hollandaise!”
I do not think hollandaise sauce is good for the gerbils. It is a very fatty food. Too much fat for a gerbil. Garfield could probably handle it though.
Llewellenbruce over 13 years ago
It was probably a lot more interesting than yours Jon.
GargiSanzgiri over 13 years ago
Garfield has a ONE-TRACK mind!!
pcolli over 13 years ago
Flossing a gerbil can’t be much fun; they don’t have many teeth. Now flossing an alligator……..
billtrout over 13 years ago
good luck with that. can i watch?
GreighWolf over 13 years ago
Gerbil rotissorie sounds good too.
Rakkav over 13 years ago
Wow, with all the spam in here today I feel like I’m in a shooting gallery.
Compared to Jon’s life, even flossing a gerbil sounds exciting.
lightenup Premium Member over 13 years ago
Gerbil-Kabob sounds good too.
lewisbower over 13 years ago
The Crocodile Went to the dentist And sat down in the chair.And the dentist said “Now tell me, sir, Why does it hurt and where?” And the Crocodile said, “I’ll tell you the truth, I have a terrible ache in my tooth,” And he opened his jaws so wide, so wide, That the dentist, he climbed right inside, And the dentist laughed, “Oh isn’t this fun?” As he pulled the teeth out, one by one. And the Crocodile cried, “You’re hurting me so! Please put down your pliers and let me go.” But the dentist just laughed with a ho ho ho, And he said, “I still have twelve to go— Oops, that’s the wrong one, I confess, But what’s one crocodile’s tooth, more or less?” Then suddenly, the jaws went SNAP, And the dentist was gone, right off the map, And where he went one could only guess… To North or South or East or West… He left no forwarding address. But what’s one dentist, more or less?
Shel Silverstein
Frankr over 13 years ago
what IS Jon’s job?
GreighWolf over 13 years ago
@ Frankr - Cartoonist, however it is rarely mentioned nowadays.
battycomic Premium Member over 13 years ago
@Lewreader: That story reminds me of the game Crocodile Dentist.
Allan CB Premium Member over 13 years ago
A man goes to his dentist because he feels something wrong in his mouth. The dentist examines him and says, “That new upper plate I put in for you six months ago is eroding. What have you been eating?”
The man replies, “All I can think of is that about four months ago my wife made some asparagus and put some stuff on it that was delicious Hollandaise sauce. I loved it so much I now put it on everything – meat, toast, fish, vegetables, everything.”
“Well,” says the dentist, “That’s probably the problem. Hollandaise sauce is made with lots of lemon juice, which is highly corrosive. It’s eaten away your upper plate. I’ll make you a new plate, and this time use chrome.”
“Why chrome?” asks the patient.
To which the dentist replies, “It’s simple. Everyone knows that there’s no Plate like Chrome for the Hollandaise!”
adhdsurviver over 13 years ago
@Allan v, very funny! i think john is a bit obsessed with liz that he thinks flossing gerbals is exciting
starlilies over 13 years ago
@Allen, nice! My dad would love that joke! :)
lin4869 over 13 years ago
Tsk, tsk, Allan! :-D
James Lindley Premium Member over 13 years ago
I’ve heard they’re better with a béchamel sauce.
SenjuLee over 13 years ago
there’s chicken floss & beef floss… and now we have gerbil floss with extra hollandaise sauce. Coming soon to a bakery near you :P
Squeak's Twin over 1 year ago
I do not think hollandaise sauce is good for the gerbils. It is a very fatty food. Too much fat for a gerbil. Garfield could probably handle it though.