Pearls Before Swine by Stephan Pastis for December 19, 2013

  1. Bluedog
    Bilan  over 10 years ago

    Is the good news that he’s going to beat you up during recess?

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  2. Right here
    Sherlock Watson  over 10 years ago

    “I saved 15 percent by switching to GEICO!”

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    Templo S.U.D.  over 10 years ago

    Still wonder what became of Susie Derkins. As for the baby-sitter Rosalyn… I’m not sure I want to know.

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    zero  over 10 years ago

    Fingers crossed this is just a Dickensian heads up -A Christmas Calvin. He’ll wake up & have Christmas Day w/ Susie. . ..

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  5. United federation
    corzak  over 10 years ago

    Jemoevah’s Witness

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  6. Workfrom
    azrach  over 10 years ago

    remembering the “Dirk” guy in Luann …. bully to some kind of reborn religious system …. is there any connection here?

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    Varnes  over 10 years ago

    Oh, worse than all three, then……..

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    Varnes  over 10 years ago

    Yeah, I’m waitin’ for Susie, too….I bet she’s hot!

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    DAVID COBURN  over 10 years ago

    always thought of grown-up Calvin as Frazz

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  10. Idano
    Ida No  over 10 years ago

    Moe: “I don’t actually belong to any specific church. This is just my way of getting tax-free lunch money.”

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  11. A random thing
    joeshmo30  over 10 years ago

    O_O well gee, i thought 4 moe was in prison O_O

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    eyebuzz Premium Member over 10 years ago

    I can believe Calvin is selling the T shirts…

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  13. Calvinfaces
    davidnkate  over 10 years ago

    I’m enjoying this foray into Calvindom. Especially since the next comic down from “Pearls” on my GoComics page IS Calvin and Hobbes.

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    cdward  over 10 years ago

    I just mentioned on the C&H strip today at knock-off comic called “Hobbes & Bacon,” in which Calvin is about 30, married to Susie (oh & still has hair), and they have a little girl named Bacon. Calvin gives Hobbes to Bacon, and they have more wonderful adventures. Only a few strips made, I think, but I liked them.

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  15. Zook
    jmartin1955  over 10 years ago

    Everyday I send the daily strip of Calvin and Hobbes and Pearls to five friends. This has been the perfect merger of the two. Hilarious and just fantastic.

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    finale  over 10 years ago

    Saturday Morning.I answer door in state of hangover..“Have you met God?”.“Yup. He bought a couple of rounds last night”.Slam Door

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  17. Stegozard
    Stegozard  over 10 years ago

    GadZOOKS, I hope this storyline ends quickly!

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    Kerrdog  over 10 years ago

    I like today’s. It’s neat.

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  19. Me 2015
    puddlesplatt  over 10 years ago

    They have all been erased.

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  20. Hummer
    AZPhinFan  over 10 years ago

    Isn’t it amazing that in this world of crime, violence, rip-offs, identity theft, you-name-it…..people are more afraid of a clean cut person coming to their door to talk about the Bible? As if a little old lady or a kid can “force” someone to join a so-called cult or other organization. People like this are volunteering their time and expense to share something that has made them happy. If it’s not your cup-of-tea, why not just be polite and say no thanks? Actually they have been brainwashed…..they have allowed their minds to be washed of all the nonsense the world promotes and have it filled with postive thoughts from the Bible. Would you rather Moe be out tagging store walls or stealing cars?

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  21. Sun moon stars
    alise.duhon  over 10 years ago

    When I was a kid, there was a Protestant church in our neighborhood that had an old school bus that they had renovated and would pick up kids off the street during the summer time (yes, that was when kids actually played outside) and take us to the “Good News Club” which was what they called their vacation bible school. There we were told that we were black with sin and would burn in hell forever if we didn’t join their church. I came home crying because I felt dirty because I was black with sin and was imagining being burned alive. My dad said “This is what they call good news!?!” He calmed my fears and told me that what they had said was untrue and made sure I was never approached by those people again. Later, when the neighbor lady down the street, who belonged to the same church, told me that I was a heathen and was going to hell to burn because I refused to back down from my belief that my recently deceased and much loved cat was going to heaven, (she claimed that only people had souls, so no cat could ever go to heaven) I just shrugged it off because my dad had assured me that I wasn’t. I was seven years old at the time.

    Nowadays when those zealots come to my door, I just tell them that I buy nothing from door-to-door salesmen. My friend, on the other hand, will get a chair and a cup of coffee and sit in the doorway and listen to them while they stand on his doorstep, then take apart their points, one by one. After awhile, they never came back to his house again. He has much more patience than I. :)

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    Curlyanne12  over 10 years ago

    My BFF was headed to bingo with her mom at Temple Beth Israel. JW rang the bell. She was far too polite to say go away, or I am busy. She asked them if it would take long, as she was late for Temple. They retreated with horrified looks on their faces!

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    Meh~tdology, fka Pepelaputr   over 10 years ago

    Moe’s scarier now.

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  24. Hummer
    AZPhinFan  over 10 years ago

    Alise – that is sad. Your Dad was right and the JW’s would agree with him. Burning in hell is one of many things they have come to realize is not taught in the Bible

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  25. My eye
    vldazzle  over 10 years ago

    If any of you know where he hangs out these days, let Dr. Toon know that Samson at DarkSideof the Horse mentioned his coffee

    I did not know it was so well known!

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  26. Radleft
    Radical-Knight  over 10 years ago

    Does Moe say anything about bathing in blood?

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    singlefemalelaywer  over 10 years ago

    yeah, there’s COOKIES !!!!! Scobby Doo movie line

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    Carl Rennhack Premium Member over 10 years ago

    1) @plus4—Where in the KING JAMES Bible is the word “soul” preceeded by the word “immortal”?

    2)@alise duhon—THE BEST book this card-carrying member of PETA has read on this subject is “Will My Pet Go to Heaven?” by Steve Wohlberg {www.whitehorsemedia.com}

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  29. Opy
    xpurplezebra  over 10 years ago

    Gawd has a plan…

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    Rick Smith Premium Member over 10 years ago

    As entertaining as some people’s accoutrements and movie selections are for deterring these door to door evangelists, I am surprised that they have them at hand so readily.

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  31. Kca mind the snp
    Ryan Plut  over 10 years ago

    Back in the 1980’s my roommate saw them coming up the walk. So, he threw on his large black cloak (we were in the Society for Creative Anachronism), pulled down the hood so you couldn’t see his face, turned the crucifix on the wall behind him up-side-down, and when he opened the door, intoned “We’ve been waiting for you.”.They turned and RAN.

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    Opus Croakus  over 10 years ago

    Moe joined the cast of “The Book of Mormon”?

    Hello!

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    Number Three  over 10 years ago

    Slam the door in his face!

    xxx

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  34. Thinker
    Sisyphos  over 10 years ago

    It’s nice to see Moe has gone straight rather than to the pen. He is ever the ironic counterpoint to Calvin. Cartoon-Boy is having way too much fun spinning the Wheel of Fortune!

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  35. Scan 36
    Bandera_Ken  over 10 years ago

    I would open the door walking out and tell them that l was interested, but right now I was late. I would get in my car and drive off. About the fifth time I did that they stopped coming back.

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  36. Topzdrum 1w
    Hawthorne  over 10 years ago

    Well, that’s predictable enough. Just a different brand of bullying ….

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    makemlaugh  over 10 years ago

    It’s amusing reading the comments on how to scare away Jehovah’s Witnesses. If they leave, it’s because you’re clearly not interested – theatrics or not. They go to every home in the world, including homes most people would be too scared to go to. Don’t you think they’ve seen it all before? The costumes, the nudity, the brazen profanity and conduct – not to mention the big dogs and big guns. Ask any of them and they’ll tell you, you couldn’t pay them to do what they do. It’s hard work and they’re not paid. So why do they do it? They go only because they care about people and they want to clear God’s name of the reproach heaped on him by religion that misrepresents him and people who misunderstand him. They’re simple, humble people who still have to deal with they’re own health and economic problems. Bragging about hurting them is like bragging about kicking the neighbors puppy.

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  38. Missing large
    markjoseph125  over 10 years ago

    Um, Rick, I hope you’re realizing that you are telling intelligent and well-read people that you think a story—known to be a crude myth and a retelling of an older myth at that, and which, if considered as literal history has been refuted in at least a dozen ways—is what actually happened. That does not reflect very well on your credibility or critical thinking skills. You, of course, are welcome to believe whatever you want to believe, but you might want to mull over the question as to why you think the bible is true, and other writings from the ancient near east—the Greek myths, for example, or the Enuma Elish—aren’t. I’m reasonably confident that you can’t do so, without resorting to special pleading.About the story of Noah’s Flood, see:http://www.talkorigins.org/faqs/faq-noahs-ark.html which is part of:

    http://www.talkorigins.org/origins/faqs-flood.html

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  39. Missing large
    NotATroll  over 10 years ago

    Ok, alot of misinformation in the comment section.

    The JW’s just offer a conversation and something to read. If the host wants nothing, the JW’s move on. The instructions and training they receive, emphasize they are to be brief and respectful of individuals. Over time, a JW will learn how different people think, including atheists.

    In their personal lives, they do work, educate themselves, do volunteer, etc. What they do per say is just a function of their cultural background.

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    Die Barney  over 3 years ago

    I thought he would be a telemarketer l

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    Darth Revan II  over 3 years ago

    I WILL DESTROY PASTIS!

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