Pearls Before Swine by Stephan Pastis for November 02, 2013

That’s definitely BFF material for Rat.

Tough guys say “homely”?

Goat has GOT to learn to never be acquainted with his friends’ friends.

Thank You, Stephan! As a planner I normally call myself a “offensive coordinator”; now I have the comic strip to back it up.

Yep, sure is offensive.

It figures that he’d be BFFs with Rat.

In this ahole’s case, he best offense is a good defenestration…

Saw that punchline coming from the first panel.

Yup, yup…where I live many women my age seem to consider the best defense to be a good offense. You can always tell when they know they’re at fault because they get obnoxious in proportion to the mess-up.

hareseldon, yup, saw that one comin right down Michigan Avenue

Bruno, and don’t forget that secretary playin’ tight end….

I don’t think he’s pretty.

Why am I reminded of former Indiana basketball coach, Bobby Knight? The guy in the strip kind of looks like him.

I’ll still need proof on the coordinator part.

Just drink your tea and stare into the cup, Goat. Maybe Rat and his offensive friend will Go Away.

And look – he’s even red-shirted.

I wonder how far the penguins have gotten?

The terms are actually pronounced differently (aw-fensive for sports and oh-fensive for offending), but it works well enough in comic strip form, I suppose.

Besides, people who know next to nothing about sports wouldn’t be able to make that distinction in speech, much less in print. That’s why the pun works.

My old bosses in pants intstead of skirts!

I find that if you ever find yourself in a situation with a guy and he’s trying to beat you up— all you have to do is kick him. There’s a spot specifically. All men will understand.