Richard's Poor Almanac by Richard Thompson for October 31, 2013
October 28, 2013
November 19, 2013
Transcript:
halloween spooktacular 3 short tales of terror man: eeek house of creeping cottonballs a kindergartner brings home an innocent-seem-ing class project that comes to life, expand-ing uncontrollably until the whole house is a heaving mass of cottonballs, glitter & glue! woman: eeeek cat: please, i'm trying to read. string the uncanny nap this lady wake sup from a brief nap to find herself in a parallel universe where cats control all the media! garfield is twice as ubiquitous & advertising is done with dangly pieces of string! man 2: eek lower level you are here hell cinnabon parking lot mall of the damned a guy goes to the mall to take ad-vantage of a sale on men's pants. but he gets lost & wanders for days! then he finds a map that says he's in hell! and all the pants on sale are relaxed fit wide-wale corduroy in "sphagnum green"!
Ida No over 10 years ago
Hey, as long as Hell has a Cinnbon’s, and there’s no cotton balls or glitter on them, I’d be happy there.
Sisyphos over 10 years ago
I’ve been to that mall, at least in my worst nightmares….
jack fairbanks over 10 years ago
hilarious
Thomas R. Williams over 10 years ago
Garfield had become not only more ubiquitous but also coterminous, omnipresent and redundant.
Happy Cat Premium Member over 10 years ago
I think we already have that mall in our city.
ellisaana Premium Member over 10 years ago
Mall builders like a captive market.
tigerchik32 over 10 years ago
Happy Halloween all. And watch the magic pumpkin!
kwanza_30303 over 10 years ago
Tell me again where those pants are on sale?
Gilda Blackmore over 10 years ago
Do ALL malls have a cinnabon? Is this standard punishment for shopping at malls instead of downtowns? Maybe we could save dying downtowns by inviting cinnabons downtown and outlawing them in malls.