From The Onion:Poll: 99% Of Human Beings Would Prefer Big, Slobbery Hound Dog PopeAhead of the College of Cardinals’ upcoming conclave to select a new pope, a Gallup poll conducted this week found that 99 percent of the global population would prefer that the next head of the Roman Catholic Church be a large, slobbery hound dog with big, saggy jowls. “When presented with a variety of options, respondents across all demographics were nearly unanimous in voicing their preference that Vatican ceremonies, including Easter and Christmas masses, be presided over by a droopy-eyed basset hound with a big, tall pope hat sitting atop his floppy ol’ ears,” said pollster Diane Warnell, who noted that well over 9 out of 10 of those surveyed, including Catholics, expressed a strong desire to see a ceremonially clad dog pontiff roll around on his back in St. Peter’s Basilica, bark to a large crowd of worshippers from a Vatican balcony, or place his front paws up on a table and steal a ham sandwich right off of someone’s plate.
“sort of sounds like the First Lady, taking multi-million dollar vacations”Yeah, that Laura Bush sure knew how to have a good time on the taxpayer dime.Her first foreign foray was a ten-day trip to Paris, Budapest and Prague in 2002 with daughter Jenna, who was then 20.The White House made sure Laura Bush had at least one “official” event in each city, but she and Jenna spent the bulk of their time at each locale shopping and taking in the sights.Then there were the annual trips to Yosemite with her friends, courtesy of the U.S. Air Force, not to mention the African safaris…
Stormrider2112 about 11 years ago
“Must be willing to live in opulance and preside over a congregation where 50% are poor Africans and Latin Americans, and not see the irony.”
apfelzra Premium Member about 11 years ago
It seems like as good a qualification as anything else the cardinals can come up with.
fritzoid Premium Member about 11 years ago
From The Onion:Poll: 99% Of Human Beings Would Prefer Big, Slobbery Hound Dog PopeAhead of the College of Cardinals’ upcoming conclave to select a new pope, a Gallup poll conducted this week found that 99 percent of the global population would prefer that the next head of the Roman Catholic Church be a large, slobbery hound dog with big, saggy jowls. “When presented with a variety of options, respondents across all demographics were nearly unanimous in voicing their preference that Vatican ceremonies, including Easter and Christmas masses, be presided over by a droopy-eyed basset hound with a big, tall pope hat sitting atop his floppy ol’ ears,” said pollster Diane Warnell, who noted that well over 9 out of 10 of those surveyed, including Catholics, expressed a strong desire to see a ceremonially clad dog pontiff roll around on his back in St. Peter’s Basilica, bark to a large crowd of worshippers from a Vatican balcony, or place his front paws up on a table and steal a ham sandwich right off of someone’s plate.
Uncle Joe Premium Member about 11 years ago
“sort of sounds like the First Lady, taking multi-million dollar vacations”Yeah, that Laura Bush sure knew how to have a good time on the taxpayer dime.Her first foreign foray was a ten-day trip to Paris, Budapest and Prague in 2002 with daughter Jenna, who was then 20.The White House made sure Laura Bush had at least one “official” event in each city, but she and Jenna spent the bulk of their time at each locale shopping and taking in the sights.Then there were the annual trips to Yosemite with her friends, courtesy of the U.S. Air Force, not to mention the African safaris…
pirate227 about 11 years ago
Must enable pedophiles…
d_legendary1 about 11 years ago
If God’s priority is dogs and not pedophiles then we’re already doomed.