Frog Applause by Teresa Burritt for December 19, 2012

Whoopee cushions shouldn’t have been upholstered in the first place.“Choking the chupacabra”: is that what the kids are calling it these days?

If I watched Fox Noise, I’d be choking my chupacabra and use the whoopee cushion to drown out Sean Hannity . Wait, maybe he is the chupacabra ?

That’s a very divine bit of forgiving.

RE: TYPICAL GOCOMICS READERDuck , Duck, Goose, Goose…

Wow! The Age of Aquarius really is one of harmony and understanding.

Hah! Clearly, you are not remonstrating with me, for I do not have cable and therefore am incapable of watching Fox News (or CNN, or MSNBC)! Further, the only chupacabra with whom I am on quasi-intimate terms is Ms. Goatsucker over at Lost Side of Suburbia, and she is quite well, last heard saying “I be spiky baseball of death!” And your whoopee cushions look quite fine in their natural state, my dear, with no need of “reupholstering.” So, there.

Comment censored on many levels- chupacabra choking and the culprit behind it, your whoopie cushions and their upholstery, etc.; then you had to go and make it obscene by dragging in Fox News. I’m abashed.

This woman is describing more multitasking than I’m capable of.

Speaking of Chupacabra, check out the “spiky baseball of death” currently playing a key role in Kory Merritt’s Lost Side of Suburbia. “Spiky baseball of death” is Kory’s term, not mine (though I wish I had thought of it).

The Yelena Bryksenkova series of pictures shows what women know about men but don’t always say about us. We can sit down to a meal, but otherwise there’s not a lot of subtlety or sophistication….That “dinner was served” probably by my brother and me and a couple of our associates.

Great blog today…wish I had some of those strawberry people.

I can just imagine being introduced to the heavy-hitting chief detectives in Quebec. “Now this here’s Frank, actually Francois but we call him Frank. He’s in charge of Vice. Then there’s Louis, Bunko Squad. Alex, Narcotics. And Jacques, Syrup.”

Ah, “the largesse of a woman who can smile.”

I’m pretty sure it’s against the law in Arizona to choke the Governor.

Why is the lady offering White Castles to Bigfoot?

Just because somebody makes a lot of money, it doesn’t mean they’re doing good deeds or that we should worship them. So many “celebrities” are rich and unnecessary.

@DogsniffI don’t know that song. Even though I was born to have adventure, and just ambled up the steps. (Even though I was very busy then).

Bye, bye, now ! Enjoy your “fair and balanced” noise. You won’t be missed here.

I haven’t watched TV in 9 years.

There’s a joke here about her whoopee cushions (the ones that are part of her) but it just keeps sounding too tawdry no matter how I phrase it. About all I’ll say is that at least they’re holstered.

Are you kidding? Teresa, as the author of a top-rated comic, must make billions!I mean, how many people do you know that can afford to reupholster their whoopee cushions?

Watching Fox News is unforgivable…no matter what goes on!

1972 was my baby vote. In retrospect it proved (I think) that 19 year olds shouldn’t be allowed to vote.

You do remember 1972 don’t you? Nixon went to China, Jane Fonda went to N. Vietnam, Wallace got shot, McGovern unpicked Eagleton, J. Edgar Hoover died, and Carmen Electra was born? It was in all the papers!

That’s one way to change a lightbulb.

RE: VOTE HEREThe thwarted RNC 20012 presidential election plan.

WAIT A MINUTE READERS & RESPONDERS !!!@rickscott is either a fraud , an impostor or more frightening… the Governor of FloridaHe is either hiding under the pseudonym of Florida’s worst politician, or he is the State’s worst disaster, since Hurricane Andrew !

That’s OK – I forgive you for watching MSNBC and doing all that stuff backwards.

Now THAT’S a catchy saying.