Close to Home by John McPherson for December 26, 2020

  1. Mm wp001
    allen@home  about 2 years ago

    Yea doc i’d roll my eyes as well.

     •  Reply
  2. Ataridragon
    AtariDragon  about 2 years ago

    “Let’s see what the Magic 8-Ball says.”

     •  Reply
  3. Wb
    mwksix  about 2 years ago

    I say it’s your appendix. Siri and Alexa only want your personal information!

     •  Reply
  4. 1djojn
    RobinHood  about 2 years ago

    Raise your right hand and repeat after me. I will trust my doctors diagnosis and not the internets,

     •  Reply
  5. 2006 afl collingwood
    nosirrom  about 2 years ago

    I don’t use Siri and I don’t use Alexa. And I’m not going to until I can give the device a name of my choosing.

    I want to call it “Pussycat”. That way when I want to know what’s going on I can say

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qQvIAs-nPSo

     •  Reply
  6. 4d28b728 294c 4516 ae64 e55d451d52e6
    Dobie  Premium Member about 2 years ago

    “JOHNNNNN-SON!!”

    “Yes sir… you bellowed, sir?”

    “Johnson, where is the alien bug? We’re finished with the hospital scene and ready to shoot the next one… and we can’t, Johnson! Wanna know why we can’t, Johnson? Because there’s no bug! Why is there no bug, Johnson?”

    “Um, sir, we can’t seem to find the bug…err, Mr. Bleeb, sir. It seems Mr. Bleeb got, um, a little intoxicated and was last seen on the set of Family Circus chasing Billy around their yard, sir.”

    “Well that’s just great, Johnson! And just how do we know this?”

    “Well, sir… we don’t know all the details, sir, but they described him to a “T” and uh, mentioned a sort of “alien smell”… and of course there was a map of sorts, sir, showing where they ran around the yard. They’re known for that sort of sight gag over there. But we’re stilling looking, sir.”

    “Hᴇʏ! Sᴛᴀɢᴇ Mᴏɴᴋᴇʏs! (ʜɪᴄᴋ) Iғ ʏᴏᴜ ᴡᴀɴɴᴀ sᴇᴇ Bɪʟʟʏ ᴀɢᴀɪɴ… (ʜɪᴄᴋ) ʙʀɪɴɢ ʙᴀᴄᴋ ᴛʜᴇ ʙᴏᴜʀʙᴏɴ ᴇɢɢɴᴏɢ! Oʜ, ᴀɴᴅ Mᴇʀʀʏ Cʜʀɪsᴛᴍᴀs! (Hᴇᴇ-ʜᴇᴇ, ᴡʜᴏᴀ, ᴀʟᴍᴏsᴛ ғᴇʟʟ ᴏᴜᴛᴀ ᴛʜɪs ᴛʀᴇᴇ)”

    “Um… There he is, sir!”

    “Johnson! Just get him his eggnog… and find whoever this Mary Krispness is, and get him on his mark and back in character, so we can finish tomorrows scene! You’re killin’ me Johnson, you’re killin’ me!”

    “Yes sir, I’ll do my best, sir!”

    … cont’d tomorrow

     •  Reply
  7. Thumbnail img 0108
    Jeffin Premium Member about 2 years ago

    Lose the spleen.

     •  Reply
  8. Calvin   hobbes   playtime in snow avatar flipped
    Andrew Sleeth  about 2 years ago

    “Well first, Ms. Stunklemann, I’m going to consult with a neurologist to determine if you have even an ounce of brains.”

     •  Reply
  9. Cow
    InvertedCow  about 2 years ago

    Sounds like a good idea, While you are under we will remove your liver, kidneys, stomach, intestine, badder, lungs, heart eyes and also some of your skin. In addition we will drain a few pints of blood. We will send a notice to the insurance that states you died on the operating table and there was really nothing more we could do to save you. We will give your various parts to people in need and your family will enjoy the insurance payout making you a truly productive member of society.

    just please sign the papers at the bottom and we will get started.

     •  Reply
  10. Profile msn
    vaughnrl2003 Premium Member about 2 years ago

    It’s not such a stretch. On line Dr. is a thing now. I’m not necessarily against it, I just don’t have much confidence in it yet.

     •  Reply
  11. Atheism 007
    Michael G.  about 2 years ago

    Well, what’s your sign?

     •  Reply
  12. Large photo0018
    wirepunchr  about 2 years ago

    I’m waiting for Dr. Sturks cutting response.

     •  Reply
  13. Missing large
    Bob Blumenfeld  about 2 years ago

    What does Cortana advise?

     •  Reply
  14. Orange bird 2
    drycurt  about 2 years ago

    In my experience, I wouldn’t trust Siri. The three times I needed directions, two were totally wrong, the third was not exactly correct. The two times I requested look up information, it failed to deliver anything more than just typing a query into a browser would have provided. I turned it off.

     •  Reply
  15. Missing large
    jbduncan  about 2 years ago

    Always good to get a third opinion, especially from someone qualified.

     •  Reply
  16. Missing large
    random boredom  about 2 years ago

    What does Google Assistant say?

     •  Reply
  17. Img 1610
    WCraft Premium Member about 2 years ago

    Sure – let me grab a coin.

     •  Reply
  18. Doofenshmirtz
    bobpeters61  about 2 years ago

    Cortana doesn’t get a say.

     •  Reply
  19. Donna
    As You Wish (ex Stillfickled) Premium Member about 2 years ago

    Looks like Bleeb is saluting.

     •  Reply
  20. Missing large
    geese28  about 2 years ago

    Coin toss?

     •  Reply
  21. Missing large
    DondiDoo  about 2 years ago

    If you’re getting medical advice from Siri and Alexa, maybe you need a lobotomy.

     •  Reply
  22. Missing large
    ehuss  about 2 years ago

    But what does Dr. Oz say????

     •  Reply
  23. Missing large
    the lost wizard  about 2 years ago

    Now cut that out.

     •  Reply
Sign in to comment

More From Close to Home