Close to Home by John McPherson for June 05, 2020

Well from the looks of exhibit A, I would say it was an old wrinkly and amply filled out derriere.

Doggone, am I a buttologist!!?!! Gasp.

Well at least Bleeb appears to be amused LOL

I wonder if he has to smell the impression to verify the occupant!!

If you can do that, you’ve made an impression!

Watch out, defendant — Bleeb is on the jury.

He’s always the butt of all the jokes.

That’s gluttial forensics expert to you, pal.

I can’t wait until the rebuttal of his testimony!

They sat in the chair naked?

Sure why not. We make up sciences and experts all the time. Though, in truth, some areas of studies are ‘wider’ than others.

soooo. I like the hinges on the little door. Looks like the guy from “there I fixed it” put them on as the match the wood so well.

I wonder which now-defunct “university” issued him his degree?

Does he sniff bicycle seats too?

I like his name.

I don’t about that guys credentials, but that imprint is clearly Shatner.

They’ll get to the bottom of it.

I have a seat at Rock Bottom University.

What if the suspect has a twin, or appeared in Orphan Black?

A bottom feeder.

Well counselor, in all my years in Buttology, I’ve never CRACKED a case quite like this. This really chaps my butt! I sent the Buttographer to the crime scene to check for butt-prints, then he accidentally butt-dialed me on his cell phone, and said; something stinks and just wasn’t right! Then it hit me, how could I be such a horses-butt? The butt-cheek pattern is all wrong! I sat so long pondering the evidence that my butt went to sleep. So I stood up, and it bit me right in the butt! This isn’t a REAL butt-print! This, your Honor, DUHN-DUHN-DUHHHHN!!!….is actually another butt-Xerox from last nights office party!

Let me guess, the office printer was the victim here?

Everybody needs a hobby

No butts about it…

The judge thinks it’s phunny too

Hi Everyone!!!!!!!! Hi Little Alien Dude!!!!!!!!!! No, no, Bleeb! You mustn’t write “DR. FRONK IS A BUTTHEAD” on the jury box!!!!!!!! :)

He is imminently qualified to tell you when to butt out.

Strong Bad would be impressed.

Hope the defense attorney doesn’t make an ass of himself.

This sort of thing is what can put juries to sleep during the trial…