Oh come on Calvin! Don’t you know that a shirt and socks is the modern equivalent to a lump of coal? Because who needs a lump of coal? Santa gave you that because you are a bad boy!
Santa was having a rough week. Production was behind schedule. Three elves were sick and the replacements that had been called in to help weren’t keeping up
As Santa was loading the sleigh the sack fell over and the toys fell all over the ground.
When Santa went to hitch up the reindeer he found that one was pregnant and about to give birth. Two had jumped the fence and were nowhere to be found.
Just then there was a tiny knock at the door. More delays. Santa was really getting annoyed. When he opened the door there stood a little angel with a Christmas tree. The angel asked Santa would like the tree to be put. . . . . . . And thus began the tradition.
you tell him Calvin – Been what the government has been doing for years – giving stuff away for free and being run incompetently. And look where that got everyone. js
I just imagined a Customs warehouse somewhere in USA overflowing with packages sent from North Pole from Santa, which contains everything from flamethrowers through tanks up to airplanes and custom officer on the verge of nervous breakdown meditating on when he should put their newest addition, intercontinental ballistic missile with 10 multiple independently targeted, re-entry thermonuclear warheads …
The incompetent organization which you are referring serves billions of kids round the globe, fella. For now, your thermo nuke can wait till you reach your teenage.
BE THIS GUY 6 months ago
I feel sorry for that kid who was looking forward to some warm, and instead has his home invaded by SWAT.
codycab 6 months ago
If Santa didn’t get you what you want, Calvin, then there’s a reason. Take the hint.
Erse IS better 6 months ago
Calvin really does remind me … a LOT … of a recently ex President.
sirbadger 6 months ago
Santa got that order mixed up with someone in the Russia Ukraine area.
AlondraRachellaLabute 6 months ago
Oh come on Calvin! Don’t you know that a shirt and socks is the modern equivalent to a lump of coal? Because who needs a lump of coal? Santa gave you that because you are a bad boy!
meg_grif 6 months ago
A long-range thermonuclear missile won’t fit through the opening in Santa’s bag of holding.
eastern.woods.metal 6 months ago
Santa was having a rough week. Production was behind schedule. Three elves were sick and the replacements that had been called in to help weren’t keeping up
As Santa was loading the sleigh the sack fell over and the toys fell all over the ground.
When Santa went to hitch up the reindeer he found that one was pregnant and about to give birth. Two had jumped the fence and were nowhere to be found.
Just then there was a tiny knock at the door. More delays. Santa was really getting annoyed. When he opened the door there stood a little angel with a Christmas tree. The angel asked Santa would like the tree to be put. . . . . . . And thus began the tradition.
jvo 6 months ago
…..A shaggy dog story if there ever was one….
Jimvideo 6 months ago
North Korean Dictator Kim Jong-un as a child.
The Reader Premium Member 6 months ago
Yup, he should have been on the coal list!
Dr. Quatermass 6 months ago
To me, thermonuclear missiles provide me with no yucks anymore in this day and age.
jagedlo 6 months ago
I don’t think it’s incompetence, Calvin…it’s that he knows what you’ll do with it!
Zebrastripes 6 months ago
I remember writing to Santa! My siblings and me usually got what we asked for….it was a short list…and toys weren’t as expensive like today! ☺️
SquidGamerGal 6 months ago
Why in St. Nicholas’ name would a 5 year-old want a WMD?! He needs help, NOW!!
bbenoit 6 months ago
Had smart missiles even been invented in 1992?
rshive 6 months ago
But somebody else got a cheap missile and launcher.
g04922 6 months ago
Oh, oh… The next knock at Calvin’s door could be the FBI’s counter-terrorism unit.
g04922 6 months ago
Quick… where is Hobbes when we need him?
EnlilEnkiEa 6 months ago
No receipt, no return. I hate to “rein” on his parade, but I hear customer service is a little “short” at the North Pole.
Saddenedby Premium Member 6 months ago
you tell him Calvin – Been what the government has been doing for years – giving stuff away for free and being run incompetently. And look where that got everyone. js
A Hip loving Canadian... 6 months ago
Santa missed an opportunity at humour, should have sent Calvin a thermos instead.
gantech 6 months ago
Santa: “No, no Rudolph…I said the Schmidt house…!”
sobrown51 6 months ago
So… Calvin never gets any toys for Christmas?
mistercatworks 6 months ago
Maybe when he’s a little older …
Peterh778 6 months ago
I just imagined a Customs warehouse somewhere in USA overflowing with packages sent from North Pole from Santa, which contains everything from flamethrowers through tanks up to airplanes and custom officer on the verge of nervous breakdown meditating on when he should put their newest addition, intercontinental ballistic missile with 10 multiple independently targeted, re-entry thermonuclear warheads …
Calvins Brother 6 months ago
Quality Control is lacking everywhere.
Otis Rufus Driftwood 6 months ago
Calvin’s new tactic involves criticizing the process then.
wiley207 6 months ago
My parents still like to get my brother and I socks as a gag gift…
mckeonfuneralhomebx 6 months ago
It’s ok, that kid lives in the mideast part of the world
kathleenhicks62 6 months ago
Santa is peaceful not war-like.
Mediatech 6 months ago
Santa tried to deliver the missile, but it got intercepted by NORAD.
mindjob 6 months ago
There have been a lot of protests outside Santa’s Chinese sweatshops, so he will be moving them to Vietnam, where there will be no problems…
phoenixnyc 6 months ago
Complaints about a service are worth what you pay for it, Calvin.
SweetSinger 6 months ago
YAY Socks!
MartinPerry1 6 months ago
Calvin, obviously you weren’t good enough during the year to get what you wanted, and instead got the equivalent of coal.
Arghhgarrr Premium Member 6 months ago
Same free stuff strategy has worked for social media.
neatslob Premium Member 6 months ago
You should be grateful, at least you won’t be eaten by Jólakötturinn.
hagarthehorrible 6 months ago
The incompetent organization which you are referring serves billions of kids round the globe, fella. For now, your thermo nuke can wait till you reach your teenage.
lindz.coop Premium Member 6 months ago
Who gives a 6 year old socks and a shirt for Christmas?