Breaking Cat News by Georgia Dunn for October 26, 2015
Puck: And we're back in 3...2...1... Lupin: Welcome back! Let's jump into tonight's news. Lupin: The People are missing! ... Elvis? Elvis: Lupin, the People have been gone for two days. Elvis: I know because I have been keeping track on the couch. Elvis: Two Elvis: Whole Elvis: DAYS Lupin: Elvis, could you back off camera two? I know you're angry, but -- Elvis: I'M NOT ANGRY, I'M JUST DISAPPOINTED. Puck: Lupin, evidence points to the People's likely return. Puck: One: Witnesses have quoted the Man said they'd "be right back." Puck: Two: They left out an unnecessary amount of food and water. Elvis: LUPIN I'M GETTING REPORTS THAT SOMEONE PULLED DOWN ALL THE CURTAINS. Puck: Lupin, sources indicate we have enough food for 6 weeks. Puck: BUT THEN I ATE ALL THE PLANTS Lupin: For cat's sake, will you two cool it? Puck: Can I interest you in a colander full of kibble?