Big Nate by Lincoln Peirce for August 19, 2008
"'You are the master of every situation.'! Now that's a good horoscope!" "Whoa, Whoa! hold it!" "Five seconds ago, you said that horoscopes are stupid! Now you get a good one and all of a sudden you're going to pay attention?" "What happened to all that stuff about horoscopes being bogus?" "Most of them are!" "...But this one really captures my essence." "Yes. I can smell it from here."