Big Nate by Lincoln Peirce for July 26, 1998
DAD: ...Two... Time once again for the continuing adventures of SUPERDAD! Simply put, Superdad isn't like other better-known superheroes! He's not Fast! DAD: Hello? Hello? Dang! They hung up! He's not strong! DAD: Man, this remote is heavy! He's...well...Look at him! DAD: Apply Rogaine to affected area... But he IS a superhero which means when someone is in need...he responds! DAD: Time to change into my Superdad costume! Yes, he responds! I said...he responds! Uh hello? NATE: Any day now, Dad. DAD: ::OOF:: Something's wrong! This can't be a 34" waist!