Wizard of Id by Parker and Hart

Wizard of Id

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  1. Alexikakos

    Alexikakos said, over 1 year ago

    A man entered a bar, accompanied, for some reason, by a flamingo. From the look of its ankle bracelet it was obviously female.

    The man ordered a few drinks, and paid the bartender the exact amount of money, including tip, when he left.

    He did this again and again and again…..

    Finally, the bartender asked, "How do you always manage to have the exact amount of your tab every time you pay it?”

    “Well,” replied the man, a few years ago I was walking on the beach and found a bottle with a genie in it. When I freed him, the genie granted me two wishes.”

    “My first wish was to always have the right amount of money in my pocket to pay whatever I owe.”

    “Well since you seem willing to answer my questions,” the bartender said “what’s with the flamingo?”

    “Oh, my second wish was for a chick with long legs!!”

  2. Alexikakos

    Alexikakos said, over 1 year ago

    For: Don Roark (From yesterday)

    Here is the rest of the “Spell Check” poem.
    I was thanking Mpeters for posting it on Sunday. (Which is where I got this copy.):-)


    Eye halve a spelling chequer
    It came with my pea sea
    It plainly marques four my revue
    Miss steaks eye kin knot sea.

    Eye strike a key and type a word
    And weight four it two say
    Weather eye am wrong oar write
    It shows me strait a weigh.

    As soon as a mist ache is maid
    It nose bee fore two long
    And eye can put the error rite
    Its rare lea ever wrong.

    Eye have run this poem threw it
    I am shore your pleased two no
    Its letter perfect awl the weigh
    My chequer tolled me sew.

  3. Alexikakos

    Alexikakos said, over 1 year ago

    The above is the third comment I’ve put up today that doesn’t have a reply or delete button. Is anyone else having this problem?

  4. Bruno Zeigerts

    Bruno Zeigerts said, over 1 year ago

    @Alexikakos

    Nope … found your reply the first time.

  5. Bruno Zeigerts

    Bruno Zeigerts said, over 1 year ago

    Then there’s the joke about the skunk, the deer and the giraffe in a bar … oops … can’t post that one!

  6. William Pursell

    William Pursell GoComics PRO Member said, over 1 year ago

    Aye the Wiz ordered the Flamingo from a Texas branch of Amazon.com….So Billy Joe Bob tells me.

  7. AKHenderson

    AKHenderson GoComics PRO Member said, over 1 year ago

    Wiz vs. HOA – I’ll root for Wiz.

  8. K.C. Fahel

    K.C. Fahel said, over 1 year ago

    @Alexikakos

    I know I have a problem when I read the joke, but the first thing I thought when I read “ankle bracelet” was, “The flamingo was a prisoner?”

  9. RoseHawke

    RoseHawke said, over 1 year ago

    Wait, what? “Lot’s”? Someone in the lettering department needs to do a little grammar research.

  10. HonoBear

    HonoBear said, over 1 year ago

    I’ve heard that there are more lawn flamingos in New Jersey than there are real ones in the rest of the country.

  11. ArfArf88

    ArfArf88 said, over 1 year ago

    Henry finally has a playmate.

  12. nazzofoggenmach

    nazzofoggenmach GoComics PRO Member said, over 1 year ago

    @Alexikakos

    ok chez moi.

  13. MPeters

    MPeters GoComics PRO Member said, over 1 year ago

    @RoseHawke

    I didn’t catch that. It’s one thing to have some errors in the comments, but it seems like cartoons should be able to avoid obvious ones like that. Don’t they have editors? Of course, I wouldn’t have noticed if it hadn’t been pointed out, so maybe it’s not so obvious.

  14. Ken Gagne

    Ken Gagne GoComics PRO Member said, over 1 year ago

    Errant apostrophe! :-(

  15. MPeters

    MPeters GoComics PRO Member said, over 1 year ago

    Why are plastic flamingos such popular lawn ornaments? They look tacky to me.

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