Wizard of Id by Parker and Hart

Wizard of Id

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  1. Llewellenbruce

    Llewellenbruce said, over 1 year ago

    Why aren’t the ceiling fire sprinklers working?

  2. Alexikakos

    Alexikakos said, over 1 year ago

    A vampire bat came flapping in from the night covered in fresh blood and parked himself on the roof of the cave to get some sleep.
    Pretty soon all the other bats smelled the blood and began hassling him about where he got it.
    He told them to knock it off and let him get some sleep but they persisted until finally he gave in.
    “OK, follow me,” he said and flew out of the cave with hundreds of bats behind him.
    Down through a valley they went, across a river and into a forest full of trees.
    Finally he slowed down and all the other bats excitedly milled around him.
    “Now, do you see that tree over there?” he asked.
    “Yes, yes, yes!” the bats all screamed in a frenzy.
    “Good,” said the first bat, “Because I DIDN’T!”

  3. win

    win said, over 1 year ago

    A birthday conflagration.

  4. William Pursell

    William Pursell GoComics PRO Member said, over 1 year ago

    Aye lad,Don’t let your fears rob you of heart and hopes. Take Heart (Please lad…NOT mine) and Hope Count,and would ya be extinguishing those fears along with THAT fire that’s sure to follow the lighting of that cake.

  5. AshburnStadium

    AshburnStadium said, over 1 year ago

    Ironically, I turn 49 today. That’s 7², for you math whizes.

  6. Rockngolfer

    Rockngolfer said, over 1 year ago


    How much is that in dog years?
    I got my first Social Security money two weeks ago.

  7. AshburnStadium

    AshburnStadium said, over 1 year ago


    Also ironically, I just figured THAT out about an hour ago for a friend’s Facebook post. It’s 343. I posted to her status that I would have been born in 1670, not 1964. I would be 7³ years in dog years instead of 7² years!

  8. Hillbillyman

    Hillbillyman said, over 1 year ago



  9. win

    win said, over 1 year ago


    In dog years I’m dead but thankfully the VA keeps sending my check.

  10. cryptomaniac

    cryptomaniac said, over 1 year ago


    Happy 49th. Have a blast!

  11. vikipa

    vikipa said, over 1 year ago


    Happy Birthday!!

  12. K.C. Fahel

    K.C. Fahel said, over 1 year ago

    I think number candles would be handy about now, although they can cause trouble, like when my husband took his mother’s number candles (she had “29” and put them on every year) and switched ‘em. Didn’t make her none too happy.

  13. ArfArf88

    ArfArf88 said, over 1 year ago

    Call 999

  14. WW2 Marine Veteran

    WW2 Marine Veteran said, over 1 year ago

    And I thought I was old at 87 years.My neighbor recently passed away at 93 years and had never been in a hospital.

  15. Fogger_man

    Fogger_man said, over 1 year ago

    Look on the bright side (pun intended); with more candles requires larger cake! 800 candles is one whopper of a cake!

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