Comments (22) (Please sign in to comment)

1. 

   Llewellenbruce said, 4 months ago

   Why aren’t the ceiling fire sprinklers working?
2. 

   Alexikakos said, 4 months ago

   A vampire bat came flapping in from the night covered in fresh blood and parked himself on the roof of the cave to get some sleep.
   Pretty soon all the other bats smelled the blood and began hassling him about where he got it.
   He told them to knock it off and let him get some sleep but they persisted until finally he gave in.
   “OK, follow me,” he said and flew out of the cave with hundreds of bats behind him.
   Down through a valley they went, across a river and into a forest full of trees.
   Finally he slowed down and all the other bats excitedly milled around him.
   “Now, do you see that tree over there?” he asked.
   “Yes, yes, yes!” the bats all screamed in a frenzy.
   “Good,” said the first bat, “Because I DIDN’T!”
3. 

   win said, 4 months ago

   A birthday conflagration.
4. 

   William Pursell said, 4 months ago

   Aye lad,Don’t let your fears rob you of heart and hopes. Take Heart (Please lad…NOT mine) and Hope Count,and would ya be extinguishing those fears along with THAT fire that’s sure to follow the lighting of that cake.
5. 

   AshburnStadium said, 4 months ago

   Ironically, I turn 49 today. That’s 7², for you math whizes.
6. 

   Rockngolfer said, 4 months ago

   @AshburnStadium

   How much is that in dog years?
   I got my first Social Security money two weeks ago.
7. 

   AshburnStadium said, 4 months ago

   @Rockngolfer

   Also ironically, I just figured THAT out about an hour ago for a friend’s Facebook post. It’s 343. I posted to her status that I would have been born in 1670, not 1964. I would be 7³ years in dog years instead of 7² years!
8. 

   Hillbillyman said, 4 months ago

   @Alexikakos

   GOOD ONE!
9. 

   win said, 4 months ago

   @Rockngolfer

   In dog years I’m dead but thankfully the VA keeps sending my check.
10. 

    cryptomaniac said, 4 months ago

    @AshburnStadium

    Happy 49th. Have a blast!
11. 

    vikipa said, 4 months ago

    @AshburnStadium

    Happy Birthday!!
12. 

    K.C. Fahel said, 4 months ago

    I think number candles would be handy about now, although they can cause trouble, like when my husband took his mother’s number candles (she had “29” and put them on every year) and switched ‘em. Didn’t make her none too happy.
13. 

    ArfArf88 said, 4 months ago

    Call 999
14. 

    Guard SGT said, 4 months ago

    Is the Wiz also planning on roasting the Count?
15. 

    WW2 Marine Veteran said, 4 months ago

    And I thought I was old at 87 years.My neighbor recently passed away at 93 years and had never been in a hospital.
16. Load the rest of the comments (7).