Tom Toles for August 13, 2017

Furpeits’sake, whip’em out and touch their tips already! See hooos’ bigger.

North Korea is an ant. The US is Godzilla. The ant is making very loud noises. And Godzilla is acting like the ant.

LET’S COOL HIS ARDOR – {1.60 limericks}

Let’s subdue Trump’s belligerence. -

- Are there any refrigerants

which’d cool his ardor

for making it harder

for us to get a deliverance

from nuclear errors’

attending terrors? -

- or Is it TOO hot, his ignorance?

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SORDID – {limerick and footnote}

The Donald is yuugely horrid:

See all the synonyms for “sordid”.

His mind is distorted

and his values contorted

from his toes to his pompadoured forehead.

… Footnote:

A thesaurus’s entry for “sordid”:

“meanly avaricious and mercenary” – “unethical and

dishonest” – “foul and repulsive” – “morally degraded”.

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I submit too-durn’-many rhymes. Thanks for y’awlses’s toleration.

DELETERIOUS – {1.40 limericks}

This Trump-domination is serious: -

- √ With a fevered brain he’s delirious

from notions so spurious

that they make us Libs furious.

- √ With persona imperious

and business mysterious,

to governance this dude’s deleterious.

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DEGENERATE KINGS – {a rhyme}

This era smacks of times medieval,

times which featured unconscionable evil, -

- – f’rinstance when lords mistreated their lessers,

when degenerate kings were yuuge oppressors

{of the rights of men they were yuuge suppressors}. …

… Of halcyon days may there soon be retrieval;

‘gainst Trump and the Right may there soon be upheaval.

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SAMSON-LIKE HAIRDO – {a rhyme and a PS}

Trumpistic lips like a buzzsaw spin

to slice off his enemy’s hair, -

- so Kim might be like Samson back when

his macho was brought to despair

that Philistines he couldn’t defeat.

He had to retreat tout de suite.

… PS:

Don’t despair: // The Trumpian hair // continues its flair.

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trumps whole life has been a masculinity issue.

I was hoping for an “on many sides” toon today. Maybe a merry-go round with lots of those short straight sides, with labels on them; KKK, Aryan Brotherhood, World Union of National Socialists, etc. In the center could be a turbine with the names of Fox News, Breitbart, Limbaugh, Drudge, Trump, etc.

Where did Mr. Toles come across all of the family photographs of Herr Drumpf ?

Like all bullies, Donald Trump is a coward, but unlike most bullies, Donald Trump is insane. You see, we got a special two-for-one deal on contemptible qualities!

I turned on the television on KOMO (an ABC affiliate in Seattle), and the first program we saw was Mark Hyman’s “Behind the Headlines” episode called “Ignoring History”. In the episode, he compared the drive by minorities and liberals to remove statues celebrating Confederate “heroes” from the Civil War to the decision by the Taliban to blow up the 2000 year-old “Buddha of Bamiyan” statues in Afghanistan. I immediately began fretting and fuming — Hyman actually had the temerity to compare the removal of statues of what were by definition traitors from taxpayer-funded government property to the destruction of archaeological treasures! Before about two years ago, KOMO never broadcasted tripe like this, but it was obvious that Sinclair Broadcast Group is forcing its subsidiaries to broadcast right-wing and white nationalist storiesBut what bothers me most is the glaringly-obvious link between the white supremacists’ march and the Sinclair Broadcast Group: the statues of Confederate war “heroes”. Now ask yourself this: WHY would Sinclair Broadcast Group require its subsidiary stations to air a right-wing opinion comparing removal of Confederate statues to destruction of archaeological treasures by the Taliban on the same day as the march by white supremacists protesting the removal of Confederate statues? I’m sorry, but this is too much of a coincidence for me.

https://www.dailykos.com/stories/2017/8/12/1689068/-Sinclair-Broadcast-News-exposed-its-white-nationalist-agenda-today

They’re both ticking time bombs.

Give Trump a fidget-spinner. That should keep him busy for the next 20 year or until he dies, whichever comes first.