Pearls Before Swine

By Stephan Pastis
  1. Tim
    Rakostump almost 5 years ago

    hahaha…i HATE yogurt…no idea why, but I just do…:D

  2. Missing large 2
    Phatts almost 5 years ago

    . . . sometimes you don’t wanna know how they make it . . .

  3. Glider sunset
    seyleigh almost 5 years ago

    Bacteria is yummy!

  4. 11 06 126
    Varnes almost 5 years ago

    Wow, Rat makes it really sound cool!

  5. Kittay
    naturally_easy almost 5 years ago

    It sounds so much better to refer to them as “active yogurt cultures.”

  6. Missing large
    einarbt7 almost 5 years ago

    Goat has got a problem.

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    scpandich almost 5 years ago


    That’s like that one exchange from Family Guy:

    Lois: Ewww, What’s that smell?Brian: It’s either bad meat or good cheese…

  8. Thinker
    Sisyphos almost 5 years ago

    Rat sometimes amazes me! I like yogurt, whether mass-brand USA-made or Greek (as in made, bought, and consumed in Greece, when I visited there). Plain, with honey!

  9. Cat3
    Nabuquduriuzhur almost 5 years ago

    I usually described things that are cultured as “selectively rotted.” (I eat them despite the colorful name, with the exception of buttermilk.)

  10. Kittay
    naturally_easy almost 5 years ago

    Anyone care for some curds and whey?

  11. 1013548 large
    bergamot almost 5 years ago

    I always refer to it as “rancid milk”. The only place I can stomache yogurt is in Indian cooking.

  12. Hellcat
    knight1192a almost 5 years ago

    Whoa, this is scary. Rat actually says something of higher intelligence thn he normally shows. It’s Goat level intelligence.

  13. Flash
    pschearer GC INSIDER almost 5 years ago

    So how is beer all that different?

  14. Mc avatar
    flyertom almost 5 years ago

    From the Matthau/Lemmon version of “The Odd Couple” (1968):“I’ve got brown sandwiches and green sandwiches.”“What are the green ones?”“Either very new cheese or very old meat.”Thank you, Neil Simon.

  15. 619jrrggs6l. uy600
    Number Six almost 5 years ago

    Cheese gets its flavour from bacteria. Yummy!

  16. Missing large
    eddie6192 almost 5 years ago

    I too was going to have a yogurt for breakfast. I’ve since opted for Cheerios and banana.

  17. Zook
    jmartin1955 almost 5 years ago

    So what the heck is in activia?

  18. Pink daisy
    meowgirl almost 5 years ago

    um….how about some COTTAGE CHEESE???!!!!!

  19. Shepherd sam
    peabodyboy almost 5 years ago

    Anything you eat or drink can be a problem. As W. C. Fields supposedly said of water, “I don’t drink that stuff. Fish pee in it.”

  20. Missing large
    The Boston Banana almost 5 years ago


  21. Missing large
    The Boston Banana almost 5 years ago

    and sice it has bacteria in it its alive

  22. Missing large
    The Boston Banana almost 5 years ago


  23. Shepherd sam
    peabodyboy almost 5 years ago

    Rat’s still going to eat the stuff. He just wants proper labeling. Just like pork barbecue should be called charred dead pig with sweet and sour goop poured on it.

  24. 170
    finale almost 5 years ago

    Bee barf?

  25. Emily the strange 6
    JoanneMarie O'Donnell GC INSIDER almost 5 years ago

    Yeesh! I read this right after I finished eating my daily yogurt breakfast.

  26. 11949866521635593993mountain dulcimer terry 1    copy
    rw1h almost 5 years ago

    Yogurt is for people who like sausage and respect the law. You don’t want to watch either one being made………

  27. Th calvin464
    pshapley almost 5 years ago

    When my son was little, one day at the dinner table he said “I’ve got to go poop.” My wife said, “Please don’t be so precise.”So ever since then, he announces “I’m going to be precise” in that situation.Now Rat is saying it.

  28. Photo 0058
    Casey Southards almost 5 years ago

    I love Rat.

  29. Missing large
    WaitingMan almost 5 years ago

    It was in 3rd grade when the rumors started as to what Jello was made out of. In 4th grade, the rumors were confirmed. Haven’t touched Jello since (about 50 years).

  30. Right here
    Sherlock Watson almost 5 years ago

    I believe “yogurt” is derived from an old Romanian word that means “Something that used to be milk.”÷÷÷÷÷÷÷÷÷÷÷÷÷÷÷÷÷÷÷÷÷÷÷÷÷÷÷÷÷÷÷÷I tried eating Yoplait yogurt, but no matter which flavor I tried it was nasty. Maybe yogurt should come in capsules, so you can get all the benefits without having to taste it.

  31. Missing large
    tigre1 almost 5 years ago

    Spoiled is the word you want. Like a certain class of people, it spoils, fills with gas, floats to the top, and clots together…and now we’re faced with finding a new use for them. ‘It’.

    Personally I favor using them as targets for guillotine practice.And then…eat the rich. Ingest whatever virtues they have, enjoy their sweet, broiled fat and tender, unworked flesh…

    And start over…

  32. Yellow pig small
    bmonk almost 5 years ago

    First thought: Cheeses, beer, wine, bread soy sauce: all similar. OK, beer, wine and bread use yeasts, not bacteria, but that’s a minor point. And bread, being baked, kills the yeast off. Not sure about soy sauce, but it’s fermented.

    Second: there are far more bacteria cells in any person (except maybe one yet to be born) than human cells. One problem with some antibiotics is that they can kill off the good cultures, or distort the mix, and then the bad bacteria and other animalcules take over and wreak havoc.

  33. Yellow pig small
    bmonk almost 5 years ago

    Oh, and Third: precision can be amusing. I recall C.S.Lewis’s restating civilization’s oratorical claim into simpler, more precise language in Out of the Silent Planet—they didn’t sound so nice then.

  34. Missing large
    whiteaj almost 5 years ago

    He would love bee vomit then.

  35. Popeyesforearm image
    Popeyesforearm almost 5 years ago

    fried chicken embryos and cooked pig flesh please.

  36. Thinker1
    FANOLIO GC INSIDER almost 5 years ago

    Nobody likes the taste of yogurt – that’s why they have to flavor it.

  37. Iyaayas
    dbmeyer99 almost 5 years ago

    A whole discussion on hating yogurt, reading some of these comments makes my head hurt. Just enjoy the comics, don’t over analyze each one…

  38. Missing large
    WaitingMan almost 5 years ago

    I like yogurt. It’s food made from horse’s hooves that I tend to avoid.

  39. United federation
    corzak almost 5 years ago

    Actually, something like 90% of the cells in “our” bodies are not “us”, but trillions of symbiotic microorganisms. We’re colonial entities.

  40. Missing large
    SMSM almost 5 years ago

    Considering they are not on vacation, why would they order something they could easily fix at home? I want something that takes a reasonable amount of time to make like Hotcakes and bacon/sausage

  41. Bill watson1b
    BillWa almost 5 years ago

    ReRead Rat’s description.

  42. Missing large
    K M GC INSIDER almost 5 years ago

    Heck, my wife likes fungal contaminants as foodstuffs. I can’t stand ’em.

  43. Missing large
    Chepi89 almost 5 years ago

    I love rotten milk!

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