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Pearls Before Swine

By Stephan Pastis
Feb 12, 2005
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"His... Is this the "Times Union?" "Yes it is." "Well, hello. I'm Rat, the creator of a very popular comic strip about a cockroach named "Dickie" and I'd like you to include it in your newspaper..." "Well, don't hold your breath. But you can send me samples if you want... Now I've got to get going..." "But sir sir sir... Just one more thing if I could." "What??" "Well, I see how you've given Berke Breathed a half page for his 'Opus' strip, so I'd like to demand a little more space for my comic strip, too..." "Are you kidding me?! You're not even in the paper and I"m sue you's no Breathed!!" "Ohh, I know, I know... I've got no problem with your giving Breathed a half page of the comics... I just want the front page of the paper, the editorial page, the sports section, the business pages, the classified and the entire "food" section... I mean, what's there to write about food? It's food, y'know? You eat it..." "... I'm the editor of the food section." "... That didn't go well."
Feb 14, 2005
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