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Matt Bors

8,182
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Sep 28, 2007
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Burdened by discriminatory laws prohibiting them from factory work and betting on Wall Street, children must rely on their OWN ingenuity to finance their healthcare. 
Boy: It is with great pride that I announce LS-CHIP, the lemonade stand children's health insurance program. 
A safe alternative to socialism, LS-CHIP promises to offer full coverage, maybe, if it's a hot day. 
Girl: When life gives you lemons, make LEMONADE!
Boy: And sell it at whatever price the market will bear. 
75¢
Kids these days so much as SCRAPE A KNEE and they whine and wail for mommy government to swoop in with a slush fund. 
Boy: KISS MY BOO BOO! 
Well rehearsed shtick
Healthcare isn't FREE because you're cute, young, and coughing blood. It's a prize for CHILD CHAMPS OF THE FREE MARKET.
Girl: How'd we do? 
Boy: $8.50. That's a cab ride halfway to the emergency room!
Oct 3, 2007
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