Frazz by Jef Mallett


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  1. simpsonfan2

    simpsonfan2 said, almost 4 years ago

    Meh. My Grandfather told me about how in the winter of 1942 it got so cold in Michigan in his town that people’s farts froze. There was a path behind his property between the business part of town and a residential neighborhood, a common shortcut. Everyone took to dumping these frozen farts behind his shed. Well, one day it got warm, and a cloud of the thawed farts wafted over the main part of town. Panic ensued, the FBI was called in, etc.

    Everyone figured it was the Nazis, due to the town being the site of the nation’s only factory which made military officer’s rank insignias. If they had had to close the plant, chaos in the military would have resulted, endangering the war effort.

    Fortunately, locals soon admitted the source of the problem.

  2. TheSkulker

    TheSkulker said, almost 4 years ago



    Sounds like a Garrison Keilor story to me.

  3. Pacopuddy

    Pacopuddy said, almost 4 years ago


    Your grandfather was obviously a wise man – but did he not think of shovelling those farts (or ‘pumps’ as we call them in Geordieland), into sacks and posting them to Berlin f.a.o.Reichs Air Marshal Goering? America’s war would have been over before it started.

  4. Varnes

    Varnes said, almost 4 years ago

    Just don’t let the frozen farts get near the frozen candle flames….

  5. Varnes

    Varnes said, almost 4 years ago

    I, personally, have invented the most efficient weather monitoring tool in the world…I call it the Eitherormeter…It’s a cup of water you set on your picnic table…..Either it freezes or it doesn’t. If it freezes, it’s freezing out. If it doesn’t, it’s just bone chilling cold. It is very accurate….

  6. Varnes

    Varnes said, almost 4 years ago

    BTW, if you blow bubbles in 10º air, they freeze. It’s really cool…..

  7. Leo Autodidact

    Leo Autodidact said, almost 4 years ago

    The TRUE determinant of cold is Spit.
    If it freezes before it hits the sidewalk it’s COLD!
    If you hear a “splat” instead of a “clink” it’s still just “nippy.”

  8. AshburnStadium

    AshburnStadium said, almost 4 years ago

    On January 24, 2004, the flow of water over the dam between Screams Ice Cream & Halloween Shop and the Dam Site Inn stopped running in the little town of Hell (Livingston County), Michigan.
    It’s the only time in history that Hell froze over!

  9. AshburnStadium

    AshburnStadium said, almost 4 years ago

    (I have been to Hell and back six times – the Hellions are really nice people)

  10. pschearer

    pschearer GoComics PRO Member said, almost 4 years ago

    Nose crackling? Why have I never heard of this before? Even if it doesn’t get that cold where I am, I’ve been to Germany for two winters and Minnesota in February.

  11. goblue562

    goblue562 said, almost 4 years ago

    We always called it ‘cold enough that your nose hairs freeze’..

  12. The Wolf In Your Midst

    The Wolf In Your Midst said, almost 4 years ago

    @Leo Autodidact

    Pfft. There’s a much simpler way. If a person ten feet away from you can’t hear you complain about the temperature because the words froze before they got to him, THEN it’s cold. Otherwise it’s just chilly!

  13. blather046047

    blather046047 said, almost 4 years ago

    Google “A Texan moves north” for my perspective on cold.

  14. annieb1012

    annieb1012 said, almost 4 years ago

    I knew a woman who was a child around the turn of the twentieth century. She recalled that around her home, near Colorado Springs, they would go out on New Year’s Eve and blow bubbles. The bubbles would freeze, so that when they landed on the snow, they’d just sit there looking magical. They’d blow heaps and heaps of bubbles….Here in Denver, nowadays, it’s neither cold enough nor snowy enough to do that on New Year’s Eve. Some years we get a snap of below-zero in January or February, but then it sometimes gets into the 70s in February, too.

  15. annamargaret1866

    annamargaret1866 said, almost 4 years ago



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