Non Sequitur by Wiley Miller for December 07, 2009

  1. Woody with beer
    WoodEye  over 14 years ago

    Now THIS is profound!

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  2. New jaguar anim 200x200
    i_am_the_jam  over 14 years ago

    [facepalm]

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  3. Dr strange
    Wenthral  over 14 years ago

    Personally I think they ran it out what 3000 years and than said to hell with it, who cares.

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  4. Lady with a bow
    ejcapulet  over 14 years ago

    So it’s sort of like Maya2K?

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  5. Su 47.2
    darkwraith  over 14 years ago

    Now that I know this, there is no need for me to ever see the movie.

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    marjancek  over 14 years ago

    Actually, the Mayans don’t predict the end of the world on 2012, but the end of an “era”, whatever that means. They would start counting from zero again. And by the way, the Mayans so a couple these eras without ending the world.

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    nonsequitous  over 14 years ago

    ”Jon’s remark has been deleted….it was not that bad” - pearlandpeach

    I took it down, because I completely misunderstood your comment - I’m a little peckish lately - doesn’t take many Self Appointed Moderators to ruin the fun in ToonTown, some of whom have come at me for being unfunny and off topic (as though satireless criticisms of others’ posts are ever either).

    I just quietly deleted it, didn’t want to make any further fuss about it (frankly, I was embarrassed), but since it was noticed, my apologies for taking it out on you, Ms. Pear Landpeach. What a wonderful name.

    Are you any relation to that Mr. Landshark that starred on SNL many years ago? He was a funny guy - or gal, I don’t want to be sexist here, but with fishies, it’s hard to tell, and honestly, with a big hungry shark, who wants to get close enough to … well, let’s just talk about something else, shall we?

    How about that Danae, what a scamp, eh? I bet none of the boys at school ever dares tell her she’s not funny …

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  8. Missing large
    nonsequitous  over 14 years ago

    Now that I know this, there is no need for me to ever see the movie

    The FX in the movie are way better. Wiley can blame his boss for the lack of a sufficient budget for that, and I’m sure we’ll all be polite enough to nod our heads in willing suspension of disbelief, even though some of us are a tad bit disgruntled at not making the Final Four in the Great Sandwich Board Giveaway * mumble * not naming any names here * mumble *

    But really now - the final entries (entrees?) are great, fantastic, no sour grapes here, but this was the weiner, ah, winner

    Today’s Special Long Pork Supplies are limited So hurry in now

    Too arcane? Too not a one-liner, won’t fit the voting machine? Sigh. The social retards who write the voting software truly are running the world

    Danae, Lucy, run off to Tabongo Bongo Island with me.

    If I had a boat I’d go out on the ocean And if I had a pony I’d ride him on my boat And we could all together Go out on the ocean Me upon my pony on my boat – Lyle Lovett

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B-_W18CWypE

    — Long pork with sour grapes and weiners - cuisine cordon bleu or I’ll eat my sandwich board

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  9. Helix.arf
    ARF2  over 14 years ago

    The yahoos claim that 21 Dec, 2012, the winter solstice, is the end of the Maya Long count, and marks the end of the world.

    They are wrong. It’s Day Zero, the first day of the next Long Count, and the Maya astronomers calculated events that will happen well after that date.

    Had they really thought the world would end, there would be no point in doing all that math.

    But Maya equivalent of the Y2K panic is still good for laughs.

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  10. Nanny poo
    carmy  over 14 years ago

    Sounds good to me. I love desk calendars!

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    wittyvegan  over 14 years ago

    Oh great! Now I will have to do my christmas shopping 2012 but the world will end before I can enjoy my holidays. Talking about poor timing.

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    BugsyMaroon  over 14 years ago

    Tech tip: you can probably vote for yourself repeatedly by signing up with a gazillion gocomics accounts with a gazillion hotmail email accounts, or just deleting your gocomics.com cookie each time

    “But that would be wrong!” - Pres. Nixon, speaking clearly and distinctly, directly into his desk lamp. - President Richard M. Nixon’s White House Tapes

    Cheers, Abbie Hoffman Author, Steal This Runoff

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    BugsyMaroon  over 14 years ago

    Had they really thought the world would end, there would be no point in doing all that math.

    You obviously don’t know any math geeks.

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    odog2010  over 14 years ago

    “why is everyone so afraid of Mayan calendar predictions? they certainly failed to predict that they’d die out in the 9th century” - Stephen Colbert

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  15. Large dolphin1a
    DolphinGirl78  over 14 years ago

    2012 the movie was really good… Action eye candy… :)

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  16. 20141103 115559
    Potrzebie  over 14 years ago

    Remember running up your credit cards back in 1999? Hoping that servers would crash in 2000 and erase your account? Here we go all over again. I’m gonna go to Cozumel!

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  17. Palms too
    pearlandpeach  over 14 years ago

    I remember Landshark, Jon - funny, funny. No relation tho. Thanks for rhe compliment on my name, it was my CB handle for many years.

    I don’t know which is funnier, this reason for the 2012 end or the one in which the two guys are just tired and decide to go for a beer : The Other Coast.

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  18. Maskitty
    dbwindhorst  over 14 years ago

    Dyslexia was a serious problem among the Mayans. Turns out, we’re safe ‘til 2102.

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  19. Fish
    ds133  over 14 years ago

    Actually it is the ‘short-hand’ version of the long count that runs out around the end of 2012 (I’m pretty sure its not actually the 21st, but I forget what the actual date is). The ‘short-hand’ long count was commonly used to record import dates (like we say ‘02 or ‘the 90s’ to record recent events), the actually long count is enormous, on the scale of billions of years, and was used by the mayans as a count from the start of the universe (they were off by a pretty decent amount, many times over the determined age of the universe - currently at 14 billion years or so, but whatever). So I really doubt anything is going to happen at the end of 2012, except maybe some very amusing doomsayers trying to backtrack when nothing goes wrong.

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  20. 12aug09
    write66  over 14 years ago

    How do I view the four finalists?

    Mine was:

    Today’s Special

    Soy Lentil Greens

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  21. Missing large
    BugsyMaroon  over 14 years ago

    ”The yahoos claim that 21 Dec 2012 is the end of the Maya Long count … It’s Day Zero the first day of the next Long Count” - ARF2

    ”they were off by a pretty decent amount, many times over the determined age of the universe - currently at 14 billion years or so” - ds133

    [ I will bite my tongue I will not touch this I will bite my tongue I will not touch this I will ] AAAAIIIIEEEE!!!

    The currently determined age of the universe is 14 billion years? Oh … “or so”. Well, that’s better. We can’t be all that sure, then. So it could be off, depending on who you talk to by - oh, say 13,999,994,000…

    … no, I can’t do that. I’m going to take the advice of my mentor G B Shaw, who said, “What is life but a series of inspired follies? The difficulty is to find them to do. [2] Never lose a chance: it doesn’t come every day.” and ask ARF2 what he thinks of this idea

    I’ve always thought that it would straighten out or calendric thinking enormously if we would just posit a year zero. Then every decade, century, and millenium would all start at the same time. It’s all arbitrary anyway, and we wouldn’t have had all these endless arguments [1] between two groups of math geek social retards about which was the first year of the third millenium, 2000 or 2001.

    If the first year CE was defined as 0 then then the first decade CE would’ve been 0-9, first century 0-99, first millenium 0-999, and every time it ticked over to a new digit at the front, with all zeroes after, everybody parties like it’s **99 or *999!

    Tell the truth. How many of you ever called anybody and said hey, my car just turned over 100,001 miles? That’s because your car’s odomoter starts at mile zero!!!

    [1] We now await the endless argument from the math geek social retards to start up again. That’s my inspired folly [2] for the day. You’re welcome.

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    IdesMarch  over 14 years ago

    I also would like to know how to ‘view’ the four finalists

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  23. Ankh 280
    David_J Premium Member over 14 years ago

    I plan on watching the end of the world from California on New Years Eve. That way I’ll know what to expect three hours ahead of time.

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  24. Yellow pig small
    bmonk  over 14 years ago

    @Bugsy, even that wouldn’t really work. When do the centuries, etc. start in BCE if we have a year 0?

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  25. 11 06 126
    Varnes  over 14 years ago

    GhostPony, flawless plan…..BTW, for the record,2000 was the last year of the 20th century. End of story!

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  26. New jaguar anim 200x200
    i_am_the_jam  over 14 years ago

    [double facepalm]

    Looks I really AM the only one here who has actually READ the Mayan calendar, and everyone else here has read ABOUT the Mayan calendar.

    I’m from Mexico, mind you, so I know what I’m talking about.

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  27. Pogomarch
    MatureCanadian  over 14 years ago

    Should have figured the ad department had something to do with the end of the world……

    Thanks Wiley, another laugh out loud moment.

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  28. Fish
    ds133  over 14 years ago

    Uhmmm…. I’m not sure what Bugsy’s speech was based on… I was just trying to point out that the long count didn’t actually end in the year 2012, even the common ‘short hand’ has 7 more b’ak’tun to go through as the mayan calendar is in base-20 and 2012 brings it to 13 b’ak’tun (1 b’ak’tun is approximately 394.3 years).

    Also, on the age of the universe, I was being vague because I couldn’t remember the exact number, its actually closer to 13.7 billion years by WMAP dating, with the solar system coming in at around 4.5 billion years. Here’s a Nasa site that discusses some different ways of dating the universe and some problems that have come as the expansion model of space-time has changed.

    http://map.gsfc.nasa.gov/universe/uni_age.html

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  29. Hawaii5 0girl
    treered  over 14 years ago

    yeah, the desk calendars was for the new arriving market from Spain….

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  30. Grog poop
    GROG Premium Member over 14 years ago

    All I’ve got are those daily desk calendars.

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  31. Missing large
    ChazNCenTex  over 14 years ago

    Very clever those final 4.

    My “All we can eat buffet.” was obviously not in the same league.

    And not submitted. Maybe next time.

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    RickinAZ  over 14 years ago

    This is the first intelligent reason I’ve heard for the Mayan calendar situation…

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  33. Jp steve x
    JP Steve Premium Member over 14 years ago

    Looking for the four finalists? Click on “Blog” at the top of this page.

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  34. Missing large
    esucarys  over 14 years ago

    Attn: Sour Grapes Dept.

    If I had friends I’m sure they would say that my entry was loaded with sardonic-ness and did not receive due consideration. So there.

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  35. Icon   jontron
    CatComixzStudios  over 14 years ago

    I bet alot of people aren’t going to go Christmas shopping in 2012. Since I highly doubt the world’s really going to end, those people are only going to have a few days to shop!

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  36. Yellow pig small
    bmonk  over 14 years ago

    About voting for yourself: all but four people don’t have that problem…

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  37. Yellow pig small
    bmonk  over 14 years ago

    @Gage Best plan:

    Plant trees as if you were going to live forever. Live your life as if you were going to die tomorrow.

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  38. Missing large
    RAUPE87  over 14 years ago

    Would like to vote, however, since working hard on my entry a couple of weeks ago, I can only vote for a 5th choice … “Non of the above” - - - X.

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  39. Missing large
    BugsyMaroon  over 14 years ago

    We now await the endless argument from the math geek social retards to start up again

    BTW, for the record, 2000 was the last year of the 20th century. End of story!

    And we have a winnah! A True Believer. I rest my case.

    ”Bugsy, even that wouldn’t really work. When do the centuries, etc. start in BCE if we have a year 0?” - bmonk

    Think of the set of all integers: -3 -2 -1 0 1 2 3 … Why couldn’t the year numbers be same same? Besides, the farther away we get from now, what does it really matter what name you give the century? Same century name for a given year except every 100 years. Back in BCE, & way wayback before that, we’re not even sure of the exact dates in some cases…

    My idea is to remove a naming glitch having to do with the here and now, by making the numbering system make sense.

    Cheers, Poop Gregsory Maroon

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  40. Missing large
    RAUPE87  over 14 years ago

    Oh, sorry . . here’s my entry… pretty bad huh?? :

    COME IN TO MEET THE NEW OWNER

    WE NOW ONLY SLICE BY HAND….

    ALWAYS WITH 100% REQUITABLE SERVICE

    RAUPE87 12-07-09

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  41. Missing large
    nonsequitous  over 14 years ago

    Attn: Sour Grapes Dept. If I had friends I’m sure they would say that my entry was loaded with sardonic-ness and did not receive due consideration

    I must protest. My entry was loaded with spleen, gall, bile, heart, cojones, and just a wee smidgin of brains that appear to have been left in a blender too long.

    “Sardonic-ness” ?? Can we say that here, Wiley?

    It’s very sad, your not having no friends, because they would surely want to perform an intervention to prevent you from making up new words until you get your actual poetic license, and not just the learner’s permit.

    They would, however, probably be too polite to point out to you the difference between dour satire and sour grapes.

    So there

    Where?

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  42. Salvador dali
    Galasira  over 14 years ago

    Ha-ha!…desk calendars… So, the world is not going to end?!?!?!

    YIPPEEEE!!!

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  43. Download
    locoboilerguy  over 14 years ago

    I love this toon. Just a good laugh. Thanks Wiley you out did yourself on this one.

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  44. New wtfpaint
    kat827618  over 14 years ago

    Good Cartoon !!! Excellent !!!

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