Non Sequitur by Wiley Miller for September 03, 2011

and married.

And like he’s going to run out of oxygen soon. Pop the cork!

… who will shortly be trying to break David Blaine’s record for holding his breath.

If I could bottle this up.

Is there such a thing, as a good drinking problem?

There’s a message in that bottle.

He has to be on a roll to go anywhere………

you keep bottling it up. you’ll either become a coke plant or get ulcers, or both.

He must have a breathing problem by now.

His wife kept telling him to put a cork in it.

you can tell its whine(sic) before its time. Or perhaps “Is it YOU talking or the bottle?”

I didn’t have a drinking problem, just what I did after.

My only drinking problem is ensuring I have enough on hand at all times.

People who live in glass bottles should never sit on shrink’s couches.

How did he manage to get to the shrinks?

Perfect depiction of modern man

He’s just waiting for his ship to come in.

I don’t have a drinking problem – I have a stopping drinking problem.

I don’t have a drinking problem. I’ve got it all figured out.

If i had time in a bottle,here what i would do.

What happened to his ship? Did it not come in? Must have been that demon rum that sunk the battleship.

He has a lot bottled up.

I’ve been sober since Sept. 3, 2011….11:43 P.M. CDT Say, ho’w he gonna reach the Kleenex?