Stone Soup by Jan Eliot for October 08, 2013

In order to teach kids how to behave in a formal setting, it’s a good idea to start with a formal dinner at HOME.

She’s afraid to get married again. She told him that before.

I only see 8 olives. Which fingers are missing?

Are they still wearing flip-flops?

I think these two are well old enough to learn good manners. But I still like to put olives on my fingers!

I think I was blessed. Growing up we had Miss Manner’s nights. We’d prepare dinner (so we got cooking lessons too), set the table formally, put dinner in the oven to keep warm and go change. Shoulders back, no elbows, formal manners, dinner topics were limited, lowered voices. Everything prim proper and in place. Years later when mom remarried, Dad took us out to dinner almost every Saturday evening to some of the best restaurants in town. Miss Manner’s nights got my parents compliments every time.

When my grandson was 7 my daughter and son-in-law took us to The Melting Pot, a very upscale restaurant, and my grandson impressed me with his very good manners. I’ll brag on him any old time.

A raise? This really IS a cartoon universe.

Kids can behave in restaurants. It depends on the parents. Practice helps. An appetizer or a small snack before leaving the house helps because meals in fine dining establishments tend to take a while (it’s not fast food). So do age appropriate activities that can be done at the table – or a conversation that includes the kids. I’m in my 60s and still get fidgety if I’m bored. I can’t blame a kid who is bored for finding something to entertain themselves.

Now that there are smoking and non/smoking restaurants (here in Canada the restaurants are ALL non smoking!) there ought to be kid sections and non kid sections so people don’t have to be bothered by other people’s children.

I’ve had people come up and complement me on the well-behaved grandkids. I’m usually thinking, “Whaaa – are you blind?” Guess they’re used to kids causing complete mayhem.

At least, the seven-year-old has gotten so she can converse without going into full bellow.

All we needed was one of Mom’s “looks” to behave properly when our parents took us to a nice restaraunt.

Chuckel- thanx for the memories.

Paying extra for the “privilege” of NOT being able to enjoy yourself while you’re eating? Dumb!

I do Alex!

I think the only formal “manners” training my kids got were having tea parties with Grandma, but we never had any trouble at all with them in restaurants. We had more trouble WITH the restaurants — silly things like bringing the child’s food last after a ridiculous delay. We learned to order a small appetizer so that the younger ones wouldn’t get cranky.

Like most of you, I believe that kids should know how to behave when out. I was a stay-at-home mom with my 4 and they learned to behave. We did very little fine dining (their dad’s salary only allowed for the local places) but my parents took us out now and then.

They got compliments for their behavior (but as the local cub scout leader I taught a lot more). They had no badge for cooking in those days but I embroidered one on my zig-zag machine. Besides the cooking they did at home, my whole pack got to cook a meatloaf, corn on the cob and baked potatoes- they had to supply their own ground meat (quantity and quality for their family) but I showed them how to mix with egg, and all the seasonings that I normally used + a few that would let them be more creative.

Nowadays kids are learning more (latest Masterchef season has 8-13 YOs) but those kids had fun and learned to smell the spices and decide which ones to add. It was a good meal with all the families. Our pack provided the sides, rolled oats, eggs and plenty of soda. I supplied spices from my own cabinet and Worchester sauce.