Shoe by Gary Brookins and Susie MacNelly for April 27, 2013

My handicap is every club in the bag – and the putter twice !

I don’t think the clubs are the handy cap. Having clubs are pointless unless you know how to use them.

Is there a comprehensible joke in here for those of us who don’t play golf?

Without attribution or apology: The last time I golfed, the best two balls I hit all day was when I stepped on a rake in the sand trap at the eighth hole.

Most larger cities or those with reservations have casinos with golf courses; do they both have rake offs?

The last time I was on a golf course was when I was about 11 or 12 and that is better than 50 years ago. Have had no desire (obviously) to go back.

fore he’s a jolly good fellow

Don’t buy a new wedge till you’ve had a chance to throw it.

I set pins as a kid on duck pin bowling alleys. I swear some of these guys really tried to hit the pin boys ! It was dangerous and you had to be quick – all for 10 cents per person a string.

Lee Trevino was struck by lightning on the golf course but recovered. When he returned to competition, an interviewer asked what he would do now if a storm showed up to which Lee replied " I hold up a two iron! Not even God can hit a two iron!"