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John McPherson makes us howl at his adroit mix of everyday settings and extraordinary events. John’s offbeat, oddball characters turn up in familiar places, but their actions are always hilarious and unexpected.
Interested in a Close To Home Original?
Contact John: john@closetohome.com

Invite John to Speak at Your Organization
Please contact John's Speakers Bureau, The American Program Bureau, to request more information on how to bring John to come speak to your group.
Contact:
Brenda Kane
Senior Agent
Email: bkane@apbspeakers.com
speaking topics and speaker profile for more info on what John speaks about.
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Comments (18) (Please sign in to comment)
tuna1 said, 7 months ago
It worked well until she rearended a semi, and her iPhone ended up lodged in her throat.
clucky said, 7 months ago
Taught by Jimi Hendrix ??
J Nichols-MacDonald said, 7 months ago
Ewwwww—-Germ fest!!
J. Short
said, 7 months ago
You could probably pick up men in a bar with that move.
DoctorLarryO said, 7 months ago
@tuna1
And after she got it out of her throat she could call her colon direct.
algurka said, 7 months ago
@tuna1
I was thinking of something like that, except it went all the way down her throat and her stomach kept on ringing but she couldn’t answer the calls. But, eventually, it all came to pass.
battle of plattsburgh said, 7 months ago
I think I passed her on the freeway last week.
dbig 1oohh said, 7 months ago
My Niece has a friend that texts with her toes. Just not while driving.
philyfanstukinmi said, 7 months ago
She only used her eye teeth, so she could see what she was texting.
LingeeWhiz said, 7 months ago
Talent we all need to not have. Here is her text the person received. Makos smslofje alpwqrityunckdls mnbczbduiopelsa!!
kelese said, 7 months ago
She’s alive by the skin of her teeth.
hippogriff said, 7 months ago
tuna1: I often wondered about pipe smokers and air bags.
RUBBER DUCKY said, 7 months ago
i guess that would work if you were texting your dentist’s office..
Popeyes4arm said, 7 months ago
I hope she chokes
Jeff0811 said, 7 months ago
There is probably already an app for this, if not there should be, turn the spoken word into text. You say it at your end, the receiving phone displays the text.