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John McPherson makes us howl at his adroit mix of everyday settings and extraordinary events. John’s offbeat, oddball characters turn up in familiar places, but their actions are always hilarious and unexpected.
Interested in a Close To Home Original?
Contact John: john@closetohome.com

Invite John to Speak at Your Organization
Please contact John's Speakers Bureau, The American Program Bureau, to request more information on how to bring John to come speak to your group.
Contact:
Brenda Kane
Senior Agent
Email: bkane@apbspeakers.com
speaking topics and speaker profile for more info on what John speaks about.
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Comments (18) (Please sign in to comment)
margueritem
said, 11 months ago
SNERK!!
Cloudchaser Sakonige said, 11 months ago
I was a DTWA years ago. I always hated it that the speakers picked up engine sounds better than human voice sounds. And when I was already busy, I’d get another customer, I’d say “Thank you for choosing (name), please hold” and they’d go right ahead with making their order as if it didn’t matter to them that I needed to first take care of other customers who were there first.
Kylie2112 said, 11 months ago
@Cloudchaser Sakonige
Working at a Dairy Queen drive through for 8 years made me hate air conditioning (also because my POS Ranger didn’t have it) since at low RPM, the A/C compressor is louder than the engine.
The other thing I hated was people who’d let their 4 year old order…especially if there was a line.
J. Short
said, 11 months ago
After a few drinks they quit slurring their words,
battle of plattsburgh said, 11 months ago
Could you repeat that order, please?
Dewed said, 11 months ago
@Cloudchaser Sakonige
I hate the new automatic ones that say “go ahead with your order”. then after you do … a live person comes on and says to wait a few seconds.
LingeeWhiz said, 11 months ago
@Cloudchaser Sakonige
That’s the whole point. The customers did not understand a word you said. They thought you were saying, “Please order when ready.”
Poollady said, 11 months ago
I don’t know why they can’t just let the customers press the buttons to choose what they want. It would eliminate sxxqh AND the total would come up with a list of what was ordered, so if the customer makes a mistake it’s HIS/Her fault!
Anandgyan said, 11 months ago
Today’s comic strip has left me totally in the dark.
Would someone be kind enough to “translate” the conversation for ignorant me please?
David Glover said, 11 months ago
@Cloudchaser Sakonige
That’s because your business promotes itself as FAST food. Folks expect food to be fast (get it?)
Your compaint should have been voiced to management as: “Get me some help!”
briatollah said, 11 months ago
You don’t save any time at the drive-through. Go inside and get it to go.
battle of plattsburgh said, 11 months ago
@Anandgyan
They are all talking like they sound when you’re in your car at a drive-thru.
You know, the SCCCCCCCH and GRGGGG sounds that the speakers make as you’re trying to make out what they are saying.
omwae said, 11 months ago
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~$
underwriter said, 11 months ago
@briatollah
Good advice for able bodied people and would thin out the line for us disabled.
Popeyes4arm said, 11 months ago
you want fries with that?