Basic Instructions by Scott Meyer
- March 26, 2009
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Tags: smack talk, fight, violence, menacing, threats, wings, Constipation. Add Tags

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Tags: smack talk, fight, violence, menacing, threats, wings, Constipation. Add Tags
Basic Instructions started out as a small side-feature Scott Meyer created to entertain people who came to his website looking to hire a comedian. It wasn't long before the comic was far more popular than anything Scott ever did as a comedian.
Basic Instructions is a series of guides meant to help you lead a better life. They cover topics as diverse as "How to Deal with Boredom" and "How to Travel Back in Time to Deliver a Dire Warning to Your Former Self". Basic Instructions is populated with exaggerated versions of Scott, his family and his friends, which has caused no small amount of unpleasantness.
Read the Basic Instructions blog
Questions or comments? E-mail the author.
© 2009 Scott Meyer - All Rights Reserved.
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Comments (8) Jump to Comments Form
cleokaya
said,
8 months ago
Ah..violence avoided. Destroy those hot wings. Mangle em, gnaw em. They deserve whatever they get.
ds133
said,
8 months ago
Ah, the preferred method of combat… violence… or eating hot wings. Eh, whatever works.
Doctor Toon
said,
8 months ago
The first guy I trained with told me that any fight that lasted more than sixty seconds was taking too long. He was pretty hardcore.
Orgelspieler said, 8 months ago
@ doctortoon - yeah but you can only eat so many hot wings in one minute… usually not enough to end the fight.
foxglove16
said,
8 months ago
Jazz hands of fury??? Oh horrors!
Doctor Toon
said,
8 months ago
Roger - LOL
Geekologist said, 8 months ago
Doctortoon, any fight that lasts longer than 60 seconds becomes an endurance test. No skill involved after that.
cruncher3 said, 7 months ago
the guy with the hair looks really constipated in pannel 3 ppppphhhhhttt